Everyone in their lifetime will fall in love. Actually, let me clarify...everyone in their life will fall in love with the wrong person before they will the right person. I have never met someone who can honestly say that no one has ever broken their heart. Heartbreaks suck. They really, really do. But one thing I will never understand is why people have ongoing hatreds for the people who broke them. In all reality, these are the people you and I need to be thanking the most. So here it is: my open letter to those who broke my heart.
First, I need you to understand that I forgive you for any wrong (yes, even forgetting my birthday) you may have done. Actually, I am so grateful that you made the mistakes that you did.
So thank you. Thank you for teaching me to rely on myself for my own happiness. Thank you for teaching me to not let anyone affect how I see myself. Thank you for forcing me to pick myself up. Thank you for trying to break me so I could realize how resilient I am. Thank you for allowing me to become my own best friend (I mean it, I am my own best friend. I laugh at my own jokes all the time.) Above all, thank you for allowing me to see how I want to be loved.
I want to be danced with, even if there is no music on. I want to go to baseball games. I want to ride rollercoasters. I want to see the world because my goodness, God truly made a masterpiece of a world and I am going to explore it. I want to carve pumpkins, hang Christmas lights and drink hot chocolate until I fall asleep. I want someone to push me everyday to become the best person I can be.
The thing is, you made me realize, I do not need a man to do these things for me, I will be that someone for myself. I will dance, go to baseball games, ride rollercoasters and I will see the world. And you can guarantee that I will continue to push myself every single day to become the person God wants me to be. And I already drink hot chocolate until I fall asleep, so don't worry, I got that covered. I will do all of these amazing activities, with our without someone else. I refuse to pause my bucket list until I find someone who enjoys these activities, too.
You made me see the beauty in independence. There are so many beautiful qualities that come with independence. It is so much less of a burden to not have to rely on someone else for aspects in my own life. You taught me to lean solely on Jesus (shoutout to Him for never disappointing) and myself. As my favorite philosopher Beyonce put it, "I know that I could never disappoint myself."
Do not get me wrong-I will love again. I will love hard. There is someone out there who will make this already beautiful life just a tiny bit more beautiful for me. There is someone who will find the same excitement in the areas of life where I find my excitement. I will find that person one day, but, until then, I will continue to learn all the lessons you brought my way. And, from the bottom of my heart, I cannot wait to see you do the same.
