I would apologize, but I'm not sorry. I'm not sorry to those I left behind. There were two decisions: turn left or turn right. A nagging feeling formed in the pit of my stomach, and I made a choice. It was beneficial to me, but I have no idea how it affected you. That wasn't my concern.

You learn as you get older that instead of doing things with the sole intention of benefiting others, that you must make decisions that will be beneficial to you. You can't hold on to things that will only drag you down. You must move on. Buck up (as the Minnesota folks will say), and get over it. You need to do things that will benefit you.

N.

You were one of my best friends at one point in my life, but that was only because you were manipulative. You manipulated me into thinking that I was truly a friend you valued, but ironically enough, you left me behind. Then you came crawling back a few months later, and I left you behind. It's been approximately three years now. Three years is a lifetime in comparison to three months, and truthfully, I feel much better. You were a negative energy that drained me.

I see you occasionally, walking down the sidewalk with your new friends and I pity them. I only hope that you've changed, but in my experience, I've found that people don't truly change. They might get better for a few weeks, or months, but that's it. They revert. I may not be one to pray, but when I see your new friends I pray to every God-like power out there in hopes that you aren't ruining their lives like you tried to ruin mine.

I've moved on, and you're nothing but an old memory now. One of those weathered photos yellowed and faded with torn edges. That's all you are now, an old photo that you keep tucked away in the hidden flap of a wallet, waiting for the right time to throw it in the garbage. There's no point in keeping it any longer, but you find yourself holding on. Maybe it's because you remember the good times before you realized what the friendship really was, or maybe it's a reminder. A reminder to never let someone walk over you like that. To never be a shadow. For me, it's a reminder. I will never let myself fall back into your trap, or anyone else's for that matter.

M.

I don't know what hurt more, M, maybe it was the fact that technically it was you that left me behind, or the fact that I never tried to reach out to you. You were single-handedly the best friend I had during my adolescence. You helped me through so much, without you I have no idea where I'd be today. As much as I adore our friendship, I also despise it. You left me. Even after you reassured me that you wouldn't, you still did. That's why I didn't try to rehash our friendship. I learned long ago, as a child even, that people aren't always going to be there for you. That's why I don't like most people. I'm an introvert who despises most social situations.

I have no idea how our friendship worked, but it did. You were outgoing, you performed in talent shows, sang, you were a very sociable individual, but I am not. Maybe that's why we lost our friendship. We had a lot of similarities: music taste, sour patch kids, and even a similar writing style, but it wasn't enough. Out of everyone that I've lost touch with over the years, it's your name that keeps coming up. I genuinely miss you Mel, and I want to thank you for everything you did for me, even if I did throw a fit at the time. You were one of those rare best friends you meet, the ones who could pass as a sister if not a twin.

L.

Technically speaking, it's my fault that we don't talk anymore. We got lost somewhere along the way, and everything went spiraling downhill. We used to be best friends, but are we even friends anymore? We talk occasionally, but that's it. Just mindless chatter to get us through a fire alarm.

I often wonder what would have happened if I would have been honest you from the beginning and flat out said "no." I should have said no, but I didn't. I sat back, and let you make your own decisions. That's what friends are supposed to do, right? Yes. Best friends, however, have a different obligation. He wasn't worth it Lu, but you let him change you. You had goals, plans, and a dream, but you let him strip you of all of those by giving him a chance. He changed you, broke you even, and I tried to be there for you after, but the damage was already done. Sure he was cute, but was he worth it?

That wasn't when I left you behind though. No, I stuck with you through your relationship, and then after. It was when you literally left me behind that the damage was done. Mid-panic attack, and alone. You left me alone. That was the breaking point in our friendship. While hysterical, I called three people in hopes one would be able to pick me up, and finally, someone did. But you were already gone, and by the time you made it back, so was I.

D.

Out of everyone I left behind, you're probably the friend I miss the most. We never fought, yelled, or had unfriendly arguments. We were two of the best of friends, and you helped me through my junior and senior years of high school. Without you, I don't know know what I would have done. That's why leaving you behind was the hardest. It was unintentional, and just happened by chance, there was nothing either of us could have done to prevent it.

I still remember the afternoons in homeroom where we'd mull over the cryptogram together, trying to figure out what the hidden message was supposed to be. We'd help each other even though Mrs. L, and Mrs. R used to tell us we were cheating. You were one of my closest friends, and I miss our friendship more than I actually thought I did before I started typing. It's a wonder how we didn't drive Mrs. L, and Mrs. R crazy with our shenanigans and constant bickering. I always used to tease you because the only line you actually knew by heart from "1985" by Bowling for Soup was, "Nineteen! Nineteen! Nineteen eighty-five!"

A.

Truthfully, sometimes I wonder how we even worked as friends. We were the definition of polar opposites. The only similarity? Both of our names began with "A," and we both had a thing for All Time Low. When I first moved here, it was you that befriended me. It was an unlikely friendship from the beginning, but we made it work. It wasn't easy, we fought at times, you knew how to be manipulative to get what you wanted and how to convince anyone to do anything that you wanted. You were the master of manipulation. Granted, there are times when I miss you, but then I remember the fights, the stress, and the let downs.

We didn't work as friends, that was definitely clear by anyone who actually knew us. You were too social, and I was too anti-social. It just didn't work, it couldn't. We had different life plans and goals, and they didn't intercept anywhere, not even in the middle.

If there is one thing that I've learned in the last twenty years (almost), it's that you have to move on. You don't do as well as you thought you did on an exam? Let it go, move on. You're mad at a friend for something ridiculous? Let it go, move on. Don't just let it go when a friendship is having a negative affect on you. You need to let them go, and move on.