In my teen years, I was lucky enough to have four parents, those four parents being my father, mother and both of my grandmothers. I’m giving this shout out to them for raising me because man, do they deserve it. I imagine that for them, loving me came naturally. But liking me? I made that damn near impossible the majority of the time. For me, I can’t avoid the cliche of my rebellious teen years starting at the wonderful age of 13. The terrible two’s have nothing on the treacherous 13s and I’m pretty sure anyone who has ever tried to negotiate with an eye-rolling, know-it-all 13-year-old would agree.

I did a lot of things in my early teens that would make me roll my eyes now. Though I never got trapped in drug addiction or got pregnant, I still managed to keep my parents up all night pulling out clumps of their hair (really, between the episodes of my younger brother and I, I’m quite surprised that they even still have hair). Like that one time I snuck out of the house via my window causing a very concerned father to send out a police search, or the time that I dyed my hair purple and stained the whole bathroom, or even my refusal to do any of my English homework, not to mention the time I got really drunk and called you guys and most of all, the entire all-black emo phase in which I sat in the dark for hours on end doing absolutely nothing. I’m sure those things made you guys roll your own eyes at the time, and those are just what you know about (one time I told you guys I was staying at my best friends house for the weekend, but the reality was that I took a train ride and left the state. I swore I’d never tell you that until I was married, but as that doesn’t seem to be in my immediate 10-year plan at the moment, I figured why the hell not? Also, what are you going to do? Ground me for something I did nearly four years ago?).

I’m not writing this to remind you guys how much it sucked dealing with me during that time or even to make you glad that we all survived it, but instead I am writing to give you a long overdue thank you. Thank you for putting up with me and loving me no matter how difficult I was. It’s your undying love and late nights staying up to make sure I decided to come home that got me to where I am now, attending my dream school and making something of myself. It’s you letting me dye my hair weird colors and letting me be myself (within reason) that’s inspired me even still and ever yet. It’s the reason why I’m going to be a teacher, writer, wife and mother someday. It’s also the reason why I don’t give up, because no matter how many times it was threatened that I would be hung up by my toenails, the worst fate I ever suffered was always at the hands of your love and mercy. No matter what, you guys always reminded me that I was smart, talented, brave and loved, even when I screamed and said that I hated you and that you were ruining my life (obviously, neither statement was ever true seeing as how I’ve always loved you all and my life is definitely not ruined).

So if you happen to be a parental victim of an overly rebellious teenager, I’m telling you not to give up hope because there’s a good chance that they’re still going to turn out fine and you’ll receive quite a few gray hairs to show for it. And if you happen to be an overly rebellious teenager, I’ve got news for you. And though you won’t believe me, it’s definitely true. Your parents are not ruining your life, and someday you’re going to look back at some of the things you’re doing right now and you’re going to be beyond embarrassed. In light of your embarrassment and hopefulless that they’ll never tell your future spouse any of those things, I promise you will find yourself endlessly grateful for their guidance. You’re going to thank them that you can use a washing machine, or that they didn’t let you go out with that boy or girl that was way too old for you, or that they let you dye your hair. You’re going to thank them, and although you can’t repay them in the same way, they’re going to feel every sacrifice and gray hair was worth when you’re holding that diploma, or you're dressed up for your wedding, or you’re coming home from a long military deployment. So, unreasonable, stubborn and rebellious teens, try not to do anything that’s going to shorten your lifespan (that includes driving too fast, jumping off bridges or any act that makes your parents use the phase, “I brought you into this world and I can take you out”) and both you and your parents will make it through these seven years if only by the skins of your teeth.

Best of luck to both parties,

Kas