Growing up we were the best of friends. We sat together on the bus on the first day of kindergarten and from that day became instant friends. The elementary years went by relatively smoothly, aside from the time you pulled my hair in an argument in the first grade.
I'm not writing this to reminisce on the "good" times and there were--there were good times but there were also bad times, very very bad times. I gave you so many chances because I thought I didn't have the heart to cut people out of my life. But I'm done. I give up. Just know, that if I give up on you, it took a lot to push me to that decision because I don't give up on people that easily. "From a scale of one to over trusting I am pretty damn naive" And maybe I should start to re-evaluate the number of chances I give people in general, but that's a separate issue.
I've lost count of all the things you've done that should have ended the friendship forever. People may say "you can never not be my best friend, you know too much about me," but that's not true. You may have known everything about me then, but you don't know a damn thing about me now. You may act like you do, but that's not surprising. You always had a tendency to lie. To tell people I left you crying over a boy (who didn't matter, but you'd know that if you listened to me). To tell people I would do things behind your back. I'm no saint, but I am not what you make me up to be. I will not live my life as the victim, as you've decided too. I will not say I was a victim even though you slept with the guy I liked behind my back and then tried to hide it. But you were never good at hiding things from people either.
I used to be sad seeing what you've made of yourself. There was a time when I hoped for the best for you in life, and while I won't say I wish you negativity I also will not say that I wish you the best because I know you won't get there. You fell so far, so fast. Sometimes I think you believe the things that come out of your mouth. There were so many times when the truth was right there in front of you and you still denied--even serious things. Deny. Deny. Deny. Maybe that's your way of coping with life but it sure as hell isn't a good one.
And it used to make me sad to the see the way you relied on men so much. Whenever you had a boyfriend you would put them before all your other friends--and you still do. You would let your boyfriends be mean to your friends. You would cry over boys you met once. You would be planning the wedding before they even memorized your last name and be crushed when they would stop talking. You have always been so reliant on other people to validate you and that's someone I do not want to be friends with. I see the life you're living now and I am more than happy to bow out and not be a part of it anymore. So continue to lie, backstab, and rely on bad men to validate you just don't look to me to feel bad for you.
