You were too good at the game. You really fooled me into believing I was something special to you. You set the board up just right, so I actually thought you weren't against me. Unfortunately, that was just a tactic for you and you beat me. I just wanted to let you know the effect you had on my heart, even though you'll probably never read this. You took what little pieces you wanted from me, and now you want nothing else. You pretend you don't even know who I am, just another girl from your past. My biggest regret is not listening to what the others told me about you. I got warned that you don't mean what you say, that you don't stay for long, and that I'm nothing more than a place holder to you. They were right. Went from being the top name on your phone to a name on your list of "mistakes.
I feel so foolish for thinking that I could mean something to you. You just knew exactly what to say. You chased the demons out of my mind, little did I know that you were the biggest demon of them all. You haunt me with each new person I meet, and because of you, I don't know who I can trust anymore, because you gave them all a bad name.
I've spent too many nights laying awake asking myself what I could have done differently and placing all the blame on me. I ignored every warning, every red flag, all because of some words promised to me by a boy who has never know what love is.
However, now I'm done making up excuses for you. I'm done telling myself words that you will never say to me. I'm done wasting pages in my journals on you. I have come too far to ever fall down at your feet again, not that you would ever want me back. I'm too good to be treated the way you treat women, and now all I can do is warn others of the heartache you can inflict on them, even if they don't listen to me. My heart is not a toy and I won't ever let it be played with ever again. So in some ways, I owe you a thanks, for teaching me just how much I deserve. I found who I'm really supposed to be when you left and that's the real reward.
It took months to realize this, and I hope anyone else reading this knows they are worth so much more than the opinion of the man who won't text them back, and who keeps them on a line, and who only messages them at 2 A.M. You are beautiful and one day, you will find someone who appreciates you for who you are. Break the chains binding you to your past!
