Rape Culture is an environment in which rape is prevalent and in which sexual violence against women is normalized and excused in the media and popular culture.

As a girl who suffered many abuses as a child, one being sexual abuse., I'm writing this not because I want your sympathy because I don't. I'm writing this as a survivor who has had to grow up in a culture where rape is joked about, made fun of, and not taken seriously. I want all of my readers to actually read this and understand the importance of what you're about to read.

My letter to rape culture:

Thank you for making me, the victim, feel like it was my fault. Of course I say that with sarcasm but sadly you wouldn't know that because you're too busy blaming me for it to listen. Thank you for making feel beautiful and like I am a person and have a soul. Oh wait, I take that back, that's not you. No, you're the person leering at me and catcalling me. I am not "your lil ma." I am not your "baby girl." I am not anything you say I am. I am nothing to you. You're the reason I'm afraid to walk alone not just at night but even during the day, cant you see that? Can't you see that I duck my head and walk faster when I see you staring? Why don't you understand? No, you don't understand. You're too busy telling me my shorts are too short when they reach my knees.

You're too busy joking about the drunk girl you saw at a party last night that passed out on your buddy's couch and "got some." You're too worried about getting "some" yourself to realize that girl didn't consent but because she was wearing a tank top and tight jeans, she "wanted it." You're too busy slut shaming other girls and people to realize that its not them but you that is the problem.

You're the reason girls have to carry a taser, pepper spray, personal alarm, and two knives because the guy behind us is walking too close and might rape us but it would be our fault because we asked for it. You're the reason I have to choose my parking space wisely. You're the reason people think its okay to objectify and sexualize women. You're the reason mothers cant breastfeed in public comfortably because boobs were made for sex, right?

Thank you rape culture for making my fellow classmates who may have been assaulted afraid to say anything because they have been taught that "it isn't a big deal" or that "they wanted it" because they didn't exactly say "no." Did you even ask? Thank you for making people think rape jokes or any kind of abuse jokes are funny. Thank you for defending the celebrities who have committed rape and ignoring the victim. Thank you for making them more famous and giving younger boys the idea that rape is okay. Thank you rape culture for "boys will be boys" because no, a boy who is taught respect and courtesy will NOT put his hands on a woman in any way that is meant to harm her.

Thank you for making media afraid to say the word "rape." That doesn't exist does it? No. No, it doesn't. The man had sex with her when she didn't consent. Is that language pretty enough for you? Thank you for making my clearly stated "NO" somehow sound like a clearly stated "YES" because you think I am playing hard to get and well, I did just call you attractive five minutes ago. Thank you for making people think its okay to video or photograph when they see a girl or even a guy being abused in any way in public rather than stopping it and calling the police. Thank you for dehumanizing me. Thank you for making me feel like a prize to be won and like you are in a game to see who gets me first. Thank you for making the men and boysm t that experience this feel like they are less of a man.

Thank you for making people think they can use sexual violence to get what they want.

Only, you don't realize my gratitude isn't real because I'm just some girl that wants people to feel sorry for her and "inspire others to speak out," right? I'm just some radical, man-hating feminist who thinks all men should go to hell if they even blink at a girl. I know that's what you're thinking, isn't it?

But I'm not. I'm a survivor who has had enough of the jokes.. I've had enough of the victim blaming and slut shaming. I'm here to take a stand against rape culture. I've had enough of people telling me what I should do, wear, and how I should walk to avoid getting raped. I am tired of "boys will be boys." I am tired of "if he calls you names it means he likes you." I am tired of the objectifying and sexualizing of not only women but men's body's too.

Rape culture is a thing and you are a part of it, so take a stand against it. Rather than "no means no" how about we teach that "ONLY YES MEANS YES?" How about we teach our sons how to respect a woman and how nature works? How about we teach our daughters to respect men? How about we teach our sons how to read or point out the constellations rather than how to pick up girls in the second grade? How about we teach our daughters that the only man they need in their life is God? Because rape culture is never going to stop if we don't start thinking differently than we have been for the past 50+ years.

Constance