I never knew you. As I came into his life, you left it, but somehow, I feel like I know you so well. I could hear it in his stories, I could see it when he looked at anything you left behind for him to keep, and one day flipping through old photographs, I found your face in his. I've kissed the scars that your absence has left on his heart and I've sat by your grave and watched how broken he became standing in front of that stone. I never knew you but you are so idolized.

I find myself thinking of you often - on the day's where I can't seem to break through his walls, the days where I realize we will never work and that I won't be in his life forever like I hope to be, the days where I feel selfish and ask God and my guardian angels to give me the strength to selfishly and unapologetically leave and find the kind of love I deserve so he can do the same. There will come a day where I am brave enough to close that door and I realize that when I am long gone, you will still remain and I realize I need a few favors from you.

Keep him strong. In the grand scheme of things, I haven't lived all that long but in those small number of years, I have never realized how someone who appeared so strong, both in body and mind could truly be so weak at the same time. Make him strong enough to speak his truths that he has never had the courage to speak aloud or admit even to himself but I see in him everyday and even the ones that I don't. Give him the strength to be his own man and to fight for the life that he wants and the person that he wants to be and not to let anyone make him feel like his life isn't his own. Guide him through life's storms and even if he comes out with a few bruises and scars, help him see the beauty in the pain of life and to never stop pushing.

Make him soft. I know that I might be contradicting myself when asking you to do this for me. He is so strong in some ways, it hurts more than it helps. We both know that he is stubborn beyond all reasonable doubt. Make him weak enough that he can admit when he's wrong and see his flaws. Help him be soft enough to realize that tears will not sink the invincible ship that he sees himself as and that in tears exist so much strength. Make him soft for the people he loves in the future. Show him that it is okay to be vulnerable and love without limits.

Help him become successful. I know he wants to succeed to make you proud and please, if you can put in a good word to make that happen, that would be amazing. Help him stay awake, give him a nudge at the end of a long night of studying and to always give his best effort. Get him the corner office, his own private practice or whatever he wants from his life. Help him define success for himself and not to follow Merriam-Webster's definition.

Nudge him in the right direction. Help him to be more humble and less arrogant. Help him to make the most of his time and not to waste it on mediocre things. Show him that money isn't what matters most in the end, but it's experiences and the memories with the people we love that will mark our time on this earth and give it meaning. Make him a man of God. Send him some sign to always wear a helmet and to take it easy on the turns and to slow down driving through town. Make him amazing.

I know I've asked you for so much and I know some of it might be out of your control as I've always been confused over what guardian angels do. I know you will protect him from harm's way and I hope you lead him down the path he is meant to and put in a good word with the man upstairs.

I hope in some way you lead him to me because you thought I could help him in some way and I hope I did. I need to ask you the biggest favor of all now and that is I need you to take care of him for me when I leave. Pieces of me will always be his and they will always be there but I must leave. Wherever I go in this world, wherever the both of us are in this world and no matter what happens next, I will find great solace in knowing that you are his guardian angel and he will be just fine without me as long as you are there so please, don't fail me.Thank you for making him the man I got to love. It was my greatest pleasure. Now, go and make him the greatest.