Dear You,
Wow, you really don’t get enough credit! Middle schoolers are brutal. Adults truly don’t realize the backstabbing, gossiping, and labeling middle schoolers do to each other, so first I am going to start by saying I am extremely proud of you for getting up each morning and making it through the school day.
Right now, I know you feel like the biggest loser in the world, because you only have about two or three close friends. Well I can promise you two things- one, those two or three friends you have are true friends. You will remain close with them throughout high school and college. Secondly, I can promise you that some of your best friendships will be made in high school, just a few short years away. You are way luckier than you realize -- many people don’t have any friends at all, and those girls who have 20 friends will have forgotten about half of them within a year.
I know you think that the way to making friends is by making yourself fit in. You can straighten your hair, splurge on Abercrombie clothes, and beg your mom to let you wear eyeliner, but you are still going to be the same person. If you want to make friends, you need to put yourself out there and talk to people. Yes, most middle schoolers are vicious, but I promise you there are genuine girls out there.
I can’t begin to stress this enough, stop beating yourself up for not having a boyfriend! Just because you do not have a boyfriend does not mean you are ugly, or weird, or a freak. At this age, guys like the girls who put themselves out there -- most of the time, in a negative way. Boys don’t notice you because you keep to yourself, not because you are unflattering or weird. Besides, you know from watching couples at school that middle school relationships end up nowhere anyway.
Finally, in the scheme of life, middle school is such a small part of it all. No one is going to remember who you sat with in the cafeteria, or that you didn’t have anyone to partner up with that one time in gym class. I promise you, even the most popular girls will look back on their middle school years and cringe. Everyone has insecurities no matter who they are, so stop beating yourself up! Plus, half the girls who are popular right now aren’t even going to be popular anymore in high school. Friend groups have a way of changing rapidly.
So, relax. Take good care of yourself, but don’t make yourself a clone of the other 100 girls in your grade. Don’t feel like a loser for spending the night watching TV at your best friend’s house instead of going to so-and-so’s older brother’s house party; you have it way better! Cherish these years, because they will be over before you know it, and finally, know that there are far, far, better things to come.
