Hey there,

I hope that life is treating you well. How's school going? Still have the same major, pursuing your dreams that I've heard so many plans about? Please tell your family that I say hello and that I hope they've had a good year.

I realize that this small talk is kind of awkward, but I'm not quite sure how to come out and say this.

Here it goes.... I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for the way things ended between us.

Breaking up at such a distance — and doing it over Skype, nonetheless — well, it sucked. Badly.

I felt so many conflicting emotions that day.

On one hand, I knew for a little while that it was the right decision; it was eating at me.

On the other hand, the feeling of my heart being ripped out of my chest and totally severed apart made me doubt every single decision of mine.

I couldn't sleep for days. I cried and cried for months. I walked around with a smiling face and a saddened core.

Partially, because I missed your absence (I mean, we were 900 miles apart, but it would've been so simple to pick up the phone and call you. So easy to shoot you a text to reverse it all).

More so, because I felt guilty.

The guilt is what killed me more than anything.

I went away to school while you stayed at home, and then I was the one to break it off. I was the one to end it.

I tried so hard. I texted and I called and I wrote. And I know you tried, too. I know the situation wasn't ideal.

But we were just simply not meant to be.

Our lives diverged down two different paths.

Everything that happened, the final arguments and the pain and the parting words, it was for the best.

Thank you for all of the great memories, because I won't ever forget them.

And, again, I'm sorry. I wish you the best.

Sincerely,

Amanda