Dear Father/ Daddy/Dad,

I'm not even sure what to call you. You and I have had a rocky relationship since I was 10 years old. I understand not everything in life is perfect and I also know that unexpected events can make things difficult, but there are a few things that I don't understand. Why do you go months without calling me? Why do you make promises you cannot keep? Why do not come and see me? And why do you think that I should be okay with this?

I used to think that you were a terrible person and I wanted nothing to do with you. It was made worse by the fact that I could not just write you off as a dead beat dad that wanted nothing to do with me. When you would call asking " Are you still my baby girl", I would reluctantly answer "yes" everytime, because I knew that was what you wanted to hear. You would keep coming back with lavish dreams and commitments, only to fall short on all them. It was like a band aid being ripped off an old would over and over again, never able to heal.

I now that your intentions were never to hurt me, but unfortunately that is what you did time and time again. I know that as semi-adult I can better understand and brace myself for impact of your broken promises, but it still hurts. When I see friends post, share, or talk about having "the best dad in the world" or them saying " I never would have made without my dad" I feel this emptiness that they cannot understand.

Now at the age of 21, I see that you are not a bad person. I see that you are a human and I can bare all of your flaws, and there are many. Our relationship has gotten better and I learn to take every word you say and every promise you make with a grain a salt. This letter is not meant to make you feel bad or call you out, but it is just a release of the emotions I have had bottled up for over a decade.

Sincerely,

Your Daughter