"Respect is a way of treating or thinking about something or someone." You keep them in high regards, so if you respect someone, you treat them well.

While growing up, we learned what respect was and how important it was to make sure to respect the people around you. We started off being told to respect our parents because we wouldn't be here today without them. Then, we were told to respect our classmates and friends, even if we didn't agree with them. As we grew older, the definition of respect seemed to change and adapt to our lives more and more. We were told that we would meet people who we would not necessarily get along with, but we would still have to respect them. That's just how it works in the real world.

But when we were ever really told about self-respect? We were always told to respect others, but how about respecting ourselves? What exactly is self-respect?

Self-respect includes treating yourself the way you would want someone to treat you. The amount of self-respect we have varies in different people. Some may have a lot of it, perhaps too much, while some may lack self-respect. Regardless, self-respect is something that you need for your own happiness and well-being. When you have self-respect, you can genuinely say that you love yourself. You love yourself for who you are, inside and out. You accept who you are, what you look like, and what you are capable of doing. When you have self-respect, you learn to take pride in who you are and you tell yourself that you are a valuable person.

How do you start to gain self-respect? First, accept you who are as a person. You are the way you are for a reason. Your life is the way it is for a reason that you may not be able to see now, but it will come together. Accept where you are right now at your life, and make a goal for yourself. Figure out what you want from yourself and how you are going to get there. Take control of your own life. Stop letting others tell you what you can or cannot do. Stop telling yourself what you cannot do, and go for it. The reason why we stop ourselves in doing the things we want to do is because of our negative thoughts within ourselves. The second you decide to solidify your goals and set your priorities straight, fear comes in to try to take all that power away from you. Don't be afraid because as soon as you start to take your first step in approaching your goal, you will find that it gets easier. You will only want to be better. You won't want to stop, and you'll realize that nothing can really bring you down but yourself.

So start changing the way you think, your thoughts specifically. Ignore the negativity and start become provocative. Change the way that you start talking to yourself. Look at yourself in the mirror, and learn to respect your mind, body and spirit. You are unique person because of the way you are and how you are built. Love yourself. Tell yourself you look good. Love your body. Work on the body that you want, but don't hate yourself because it's not "born" the way you want it. Be positive, but also know that not everything will work in your favor. Do not use that as a reason to stop going for what you want. Obstacles are part of every road. If it was an easy journey, everyone would be doing it, but that's what makes you stronger. You have the strength to push through the setbacks in approaching your goal. Use these mistakes and downfalls to help you get back up stronger.

Treat yourself respectfully. Many people tend to put the needs of others before their own. It is a great characteristic to have, and it may be the reason why people respect that person. However, there is a borderline between you helping another person and neglecting yourself. In order to respect and be there for others, you need to be able to do that to yourself first. How can you expect to make someone else happy if you cannot even satisfy your physical and emotional needs. How can you love someone else if you cannot love yourself? And how do you expect someone to love you if you don't know what loving yourself means?

Why is self-respect so important? We attract people in our lives who are able to reflect what our minds are like. In other words, we attract people who are similar to us, who think the same way as us. Would you want someone to love you when they are not capable of loving themselves? Would you think that would be healthy? That this person will love you more than he/she will love him/herself? If you have self-respect, you will start to realize that you will be around a crowd who are capable of respecting themselves too. You will begin to create boundaries for yourself of what's right for you and what's not okay. You will know when to help others and when to protect yourself because in reality how can you fight someone's battles for them if you cannot even stick up for yourself? You will let go of the people in your life who bring negativity and do not respect you. Why? Because you respect yourself, and you know that you deserve better. And every person deserves the best they can get.

So I hope one day, you can believe yourself when you say, "I love myself for who I am."