In light of it being Boyfriend Day on October 3rd, I find myself unexpectedly writing this article from a place I haven't really accepted until junior year of college.

I haven't always been the sort of girl to jump from relationship to relationship. In high school, I dated boys for decently lengthy amounts of time, whether it was six months or eleven months at the time. Junior and senior year, I always had a boyfriend, with a minimum of a few weeks in between each of the relationships, even though the total boyfriend count added up to only three by the end of senior year.

In college, I started dating new guys I'd never even thought I'd even want to date in years prior. I dated jocks, musicians, Average Joes, and everyone in between. These relationships only lasted a few weeks or, if I was lucky, a couple months at a time, but I always found myself uninterested and feeling a loss of attraction for said guy after only a couple weeks of involvement.

This cycle continued into this summer and I could not ever seem to find anybody who sparked my interest for more than two weeks. I began to feel like a sociopathic jerk who couldn't keep feelings for even the sweetest man that would attempt to woo me and sweep me off of my feet.

And then, I pieced together what my problem was.

I couldn't accept that I would be alright being single. This stigma exists for women all over the globe; in other words, if you aren't constantly on the lookout for your knight in shining armor, or the guy who will send you the overly cliché, "Good morning beautiful" texts each day, then you are obviously doing it wrong. Aren't you?

Or are you? What's so great about constantly dating every man who approaches you and trying to force feelings for men who would work out far better as close friends? What's the point of making yourself feel bad for feeling completely valid and adequate feelings of disinterest when you try to have feelings for somebody you simply don't click with?

Nothing is great about that. If you're ever going to be happy, you need to put your best interest and responsibilities at the top of your to-do list. You can't just keep jumping from relationship to relationship with no gap in between each. Give yourself some time to think and breathe and figure out what YOU need. We need to stop feeling bad for the boys who chase after us who we aren't interested in, and we need to stop dating them to "give them a chance because they're nice."

Not everyone knows who they're meant to be with, and that's okay. We try to force relationships that seem like they "should" work out based on our friends and family's random predictions, and we apologize for the unacceptable behaviors of the people we date because we're often so desperate for love that we excuse abuse and outright disrespect from our partners.

The expectation that you should constantly be searching for somebody needs to end. It's completely acceptable to be single and to be figuring out what YOU need in a real, lasting relationship before you involve yourself in another meaningless one. You need not feel guilty for denying a man or woman who doesn't attract you in the way that you want and need, and that is completely valid and reasonable.

The person you're meant to be with might very well be in another relationship right now. They might be halfway across the world or they might be living in your building or across the street. You may have met them, or maybe you haven't. However, you don't need to bend over backwards trying to find them. It'll happen when it's meant to.

Being single does not mean you have to be sad. It does not mean you're lonely or pathetic, and it certainly doesn't mean you need to be constantly forcing relationships that shouldn't be taking place. It may very well just mean that you're focusing on creating the best version of you that you can. It may very well mean that you're going to have a better time finding somebody with whom you actually connect on a personal level rather than forcing something that shouldn't be. It's okay to wait, and it's okay to find something real at your own pace.

The day we stop forcing relationships is the day we open ourselves to the world of possibilities waiting out there for us--and out there is somebody you're really going to love and care for one day.