Growing up on Long Island, where there is a strong and prominent Jewish community, I never really thought much about my Jewish identity. I didn’t have to. I wasn’t raised in a traditional Jewish household, nor did I practice my religion regularly. I had never questioned what it meant to be Jewish, I just was. All of this changed when I moved to Texas, a place that I am clearly a minority.
When I first moved to Austin to start the sorority rush process at UT, I couldn’t help but realize that I was one of very few girls with dark, curly hair. Most girls were tall, tan, and had luscious, straight, blonde hair with piercing blue eyes. Being Jewish does come with baggage, it just took me until I was a minority to realize it.
I am Jewish, but I don’t “look” Jewish.
Jewish people are often rendered for their large noses, dark features, kippahs, long beards, and payots. While some Jewish people may have some or all of these features, it doesn’t necessarily mean we all do. We aren’t as easy to depict as some may think we are.
Like other religions, we have different sects and levels of practice. Hasidic, orthodox, conservative, and reformed, just to name a few. We all engage in Judaism to different extents. While some of us may just go to synagogue on the high holidays, others may pray before every meal and keep kosher. While some of us wear kippahs, others don’t. And so on and so forth.
I am Jewish, but I am not cheap.
Jews have always been thought of as a cheap and stingy people. It’s believed that we have one goal in mind: accumulating wealth. While, yes, many of us are successful working in Hollywood, or working as doctors, lawyers, and businessmen, not everything we do revolves around monetary self-interest.
In fact, giving back to communities through tzedakah and performing mitzvahs, or good deeds, is of utmost importance in our religion.
I am Jewish but, I am not materialistic.
Jewish people, particularly women, are portrayed as materialistic people. We are often thought of as spoiled or bratty when things don’t go our way. Actually, there is a term for women like this, coined “JAP,” or Jewish American Princess. While I can’t defend every Jewish woman I’ve met for not being a “JAP,” it’s unfair to categorize all Jewish women this way. Just like not every sorority girl in the South is a stuck-up, shallow trust fund baby.
Within every sect and religion, you are bound to see some people more spoiled than others. This idea of being materialistic is a human quality, not a Jewish quality.
I am Jewish, but I am not a complainer.
Jews are often depicted as being overdramatic, always complaining, and always frantic. This is an overgeneralization. Again this is a characteristic of humans, not just Jews. Actually, Jews are reminded not to complain about the little things in life, as our ancestors have suffered much worse.
I am Jewish, but I do not pity myself.
People often assume that Jewish people are ashamed of their religion, that they are embarrassed about their history. Although others may see our religion as lesser than theirs, we don’t.
We see our religion as holy and don’t see other religions as being any less important than our own. We are proud to carry the Jewish faith forward through the many trials of our history. We are a strong and proud people.
I am Jewish, but I am not your punch line.
Time after time, people have thrown Jewish jokes at me. Even people I consider friends do this, unaware of its offensiveness. Don’t act surprised when I don’t laugh next time you see me drop change and you make some type of foolish attempt to relate it to my apparent “Jewish stinginess”. I will not allow my religion to fall victim to these hateful jokes.
I am Jewish, but I don't know every Jew on the planet.
It is definitely a stereotype that all Jews know each other. We actually joke about it and we love a good game of "Jewish Geography". Yes, the Jewish community is well-connected, but just because I know someone with the last name Stein or Cohen, doesn't mean I know your aunt's cousin's friend with the last name Levy. What could be a fun game can quickly turn into something offensive.
I am Jewish, but I am not on a mission to find a “nice Jewish boy.”
People often assume that to every “JAP” there needs to be an accomplice: a “NJB,” or nice Jewish boy. While dating within the religion, can help with some complications, it is not important to me, amongst many other Jewish girls, to solely date Jewish boys. It’s unfair to assume that because we don’t practice the same religion as you, that we don’t have any interest in you.
I am Jewish, but I am not subordinate.
Throughout history, Jews have been discriminated against and persecuted. No one should ever look at me, or any Jew, as inhumane or more specifically as a “parasite.”
We are much more than that. I am a sister, a daughter, a granddaughter, a niece, a cousin, and a friend. I give and receive love. I am a human being, just like you.