I always felt more alone surrounded by people, than I did when I was by myself. That's a little strange right? Shouldn't it be the opposite? Shouldn't I be gushing with excitement and happiness when I'm with my friends? Not only do I feel most alone when with people, but I feel uneasy and kind of awkward, to say the least. I am at my greatest when I'm alone and I want to put it out there, that being alone with your thoughts is more valuable than anything.
It's liberating. So many people are afraid of being alone. It's something amazing to get used to. When I say I enjoy being alone, people always say things like, "Oh, I could never go out to eat alone. That's so scary." or "You went to the movies by yourself?" That isn't quite what I mean by being and doing things alone.But listen, it isn't a scary thing; it's an important thing.
You are able to express yourself any way that you want. No one is going to knock down what you say, no one is there to interrupt you. Do you ever zone out and someone asks "What are you looking at" and you lose your train of thought? That is the absolute worst but when I'm alone I get to explore my thoughts and try to understand a little deeper. Especially, and not to point fingers, but all people my age. They are obsessed with finding their significant other and let me give you all some advice: You do not need a man or woman to define you. Those people don't make who you are. You do. You would realize who you truly are without a S/O if you took more time being alone and less time relationship hopping. You need to take time for yourself.
We need to slow down.
Life is a constant go, go, go. So many friends and family around me are constantly moving and I feel like none have ever taken the alone time to really think. Now, I don't mean they don't lay in bed in the morning and think about dinner for that night. I mean reflect on themselves. Reflect on what choices they have been making; how to make it better, how they could change something bad to more positive. People say being around others "relaxes them" but I definitely do not feel relaxed around my friends. I like to recharge my mind, sort of say, and declutter my thoughts. We are always going, but are we making impulsive decisions along with it? Is it truly the choice you wanted? Who knows.
You can be your own boss.
Who doesn't love that? Just one day you need. One day of no one to adhere to, no expectations of others, no schedule obligations... Just one day of hiking, laying out by the pool, or if you wanna go to dinner alone, that's cool too. When I'm home I love to be quiet and maybe scroll around on Twitter. Maybe I treat my dog to that longer walk he will enjoy. I'm listening to music, not talking, and I'm not doing it because I'm procrastinating homework... It is my down time and many people, more and more I realize, are forgetting to take that for themselves.
It's true relaxation time without the guilt! Amazing, right?
Taking time can really improve your mental health I can promise you. Your mind will not feel so heavy and nothing is worth the burden. This does not mean your antisocial, it does not mean your friends annoy you, this just means you want to take time for yourself. (Not in a corny, "We have to break up because I need time to myself" sort of way either, because we all know what that truly means.)
