The day that you have felt like your whole life has led up to is finally here and you could not be any more excited. High school is over and a great summer spent at work and with friends has concluded. Our Honda Fit is packed to the brim, and you're crammed between pillows and clothes you probably don't need all of, but you swear you'll wear more than once (trust me, you won't). With AMP 103.3 playing in the background and thoughts about whether you'll be too distracted living on your own for the first time clouding your mind, you look out the window and watch the trees go by as you cross the border from Massachusetts into New Hampshire.
As a soon to be senior in college, I get it. With new friends, activities, and classes ahead of you, you really do not know what to think of it. I am here to tell you that it's never going to be what you expect. Curve balls are going to be thrown at you every day. Learning how to sit on those experiences and learn from them is what will shape you into the person that college is meant to make you. So you got a C+ on an exam you stayed up all night studying for? There will be other chances for you to redeem yourself. You and a friend you met at orientation that you swear you saw yourself becoming close with go your separate ways when you finally get back on campus. It's alright because there are 4,000 other students on campus dying to meet you.
It's all easier said then done, but I'm here to provide you with a few things I wish I would have known going into my freshman year of college (three years ago now! Gee I'm quite the dinosaur). So sit back, relax, and enjoy the two hour ride sandwiched in the Honda Fit.
1. It's okay to treat yourself to a slice of pizza or a scoop of ice cream...just not every day.
You just took your first exam of the semester and your completely disappointed with yourself. Though you haven't gotten the marks back yet, you know you performed poorly. As you wait in line to swipe into the dining hall, the pizza of the day catches your eye. You know you shouldn't...but just one slice...or two isn't so bad? Right?
You're going to have those days or nights at school where you want to eat your feelings in food. That's totally understandable and I've definitely been there multiple times (the freshman 30 I gained is clear evidence of that). However, it's important that you take care of yourself while you are living alone. Eating healthy, drinking enough water, and getting plenty of exercise are things I wish I could go back and drill into my 18 year old brain. Over the course of my freshman year, I gained 30 pounds and could barely look at myself in the mirror without feeling anything but regret. Though I was able to get back into shape the summer after, my weight has been something I have struggled with ever since. Learning to take care of yourself early on is not only beneficial in that it adds years onto your life, but it improves your academics and boosts your happiness as well. Limit yourself to a trip to the pizza station once a week! Pick Friday so you have something to look forward to at the end of a long hard week of school.
2. Everybody you meet has grown up differently and has something new to teach that you can benefit from...do not be quick to judge and make assumptions based on your own ignorance.
She looks down at her Michael Kors watch and taps her foot impatiently as she waits for the Starbucks barista to make her skinny iced vanilla latte. Mom says that if she gains even half a pound, Bianca will not be attending the annual family vacation to their time share on the Turks and Caicos Islands. She leans down to rub a smudge off her new Jack Rodgers sandals she got as a graduation gift from her grandparents, and sighs heavily. Guess they are not as equipped for walking these city streets to class as she had hoped. You slurp your frappe and take a bite of a warm flaky croissant as you start to make a dent at the first assignment of the semester. You can't help but chuckle to yourself as a girl dressed in name brand from head to toe nearly drops her drink attempting to juggle it with her books and designer handbag while simultaneously reaching for the door. You shake your head and look back down at your computer.
There are going to be plenty of instances where you meet people who seem either more or less fortunate than you are. That's one of the many ways that diversifies college more so than high school. What's important is that when you meet someone like Bianca, for example, that you don't brush her aside because you believe that she is a product of "mommy and daddy's money." Just like you, Bianca was accepted and here for a reason: to find herself while completing a degree of her choice. What you don't know is that Bianca makes a mean smoothie in the nutribullet, and was the starting striker on her high school's varsity soccer team. Just like how you wouldn't want Bianca to assume anything about you based on your appearance, you should assume the same about her. We all have something to offer each other and breaking out of your comfort zone is one way you can learn from others who you perceive to be different.
She's sitting alone at one of the single tables twirling her noodles with a fork and putting them back down again. Laughing along with your new friends, you all sit down at a round table and share a communal basket of fries. You can't help but notice the same girl who you had seen earlier that morning nearly make a fool of herself in Starbucks. She's sitting alone, looking down at her plate of untouched food, clearly attempting to avoid eye contact with her peers. There's something awfully sad about her. Spontaneous and totally out of character, you decide to get up and walk over to her table. You wouldn't want to be sitting alone on the first day. Bianca looks up from her plate, obviously shocked that someone has come up to her. After inviting her to come sit with you and your friends, she follows behind you as you two make chit chat about the first day of classes. She's funnier than you thought she would be.
3. There's a time and place for everything...just be smart about whether you should go to that big football party or not.
Campus is booming with students screaming and celebrating on the fact that the football team just won their first bowl game in four years. You're walking arm and arm with two of your floor mates back to the dorms, discussing the agenda for tonight. With the exam you have on Monday haunting the back of your mind, you wonder if it's worth it to skip studying for a night of drinking. "So my room at 9? You down?" Your friend turns to you and asks just before you part ways at the third floor door.
Though it seems like an opportunity like this will not present itself again, it will. You'll soon find out that there are parties for everything and every occasion in college. If you know that you should be studying for that big exam you have on Monday, then maybe it's a better that you sign a rain check for your friends and get together with them another night. You're probably tired of hearing that your academics are the most important thing in college. I was too. But keeping that in the back of your mind will put you in a better position in the long run because they really do come first. There will be plenty of times to go out in the next four years you spend on your campus. Just know when you can and when you should probably be preparing for class. I'd take an A+ on an exam over a nasty hangover any day, if that helps put it in a better perspective for you.
4. BE YOURSELF.
I cannot stress this last pointer enough. You're going to feel pressured to pretend to be someone your not in hopes of impressing others. There's no need when we both know that there are plenty of people who like you for YOU. Knowing that, you should not feel the need to be someone your not. In the rare circumstance that you find someone that does not like you, screw them. There are plenty of fish in the sea. Find the fish that aren't afraid of looking weird in public or riding bikes in onesies after 10 p.m. in Walmart. Those fish are the ones that you want to keep around.
And with that, I wish you the best of luck. You have left your mark on the people of your hometown. It is time to put the drama behind you and to take a fresh new step on your campus. Your new home. Your home away from home. The time is now.
You are ready.
- Yas
