At some point in our lives, I bet you've heard the saying, "You're adopted," meaning that someone was unwanted. Countless T shows, movies, and internet memes have used this saying to call someone undesired.
Since the age of two, I grew up thinking I was different than all the other children I went to school with because I was adopted. I grew up with amazing parents who loved me more than anything, which made it more offensive when I heard jokes like these. My adoptive parents were extremely tall, with my mom being 5'10" and my dad being 6'1", while I am stuck at 4'11". There are many other physical differences between me and my adoptive parents. I often had these differences pointed out to me in ways like: "What happened to you for you to be so short?" "Are you the milk man's baby?" "What -- were you adopted?"
These sayings only made me annoyed because I would then have to tell them a long story about how I don't look like my parents because they couldn't have children of their own so they adopted me. Now let me start by saying I have no shame in being adopted because there is nothing wrong or shameful about being adopted. The only thing that makes me upset about hearing people say, "Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry that you were adopted!" after I tell them I was adopted. I never understood why everyone apologized for something that wasn't negative. My adoptive parents loved me; my birth parents were able to grow up and get their education without having to raise a child (or at least I had hoped). I was happy, so why were people sorry? It was because of the fact that being called adopted always had a negative connotation around it.
Well, I'm here to explain to you how being adopted doesn't deserve a negative connotation. The main thing about how being adopted makes you unwanted/unloved because your parents couldn't have their own children, yet the adoption process is so strenuous, tedious, and expensive that it almost makes an adoptive child more special because the parents had to do so much more than just have a baby. Also, there are unplanned babies, but there is no way to accidentally adopt a baby. If anything, someone loved you enough to realize they couldn't give you the best life so you are given to a family who wants you more and more every day they have to wait for you, then when they have you they treat you beyond well because they actually have a precious gift from another person.
Now, sadly not all children get to go into loving homes like mine and some kids have to stay in foster homes, so hearing jokes like these in their life just solidifies their own insecurities in their brains. I was lucky to go to a family who loves and cares about me so those jokes don't get to me, but these jokes need to be eradicated so the kids who feel this way about themselves shouldn't have to view their own existence as a mistake. Now if you want to be someone who can truly make a different in some of these kids' lives, you can become a court appointed special advocate (CASA). Their job is to work with children who have been placed in foster care to make sure that the child's welfare is always the top priority. You can make a change by visiting this website to see if you are able to become a CASA in your area.
In conclusion, these jokes are just flat out annoying. To the children who were lucky enough to be adopted into loving and caring homes, and for the children who have to be forced to have their insecurities laughed about on TV and in movies. Let's make a change to show these kids their existence is more than just a joke.
