This past weekend, I babysat the cutest little baby while her parents were at a wedding. While in the elevator heading up to the room, the mother was telling me different things about her daughter, and then started to tell me about the wedding. All of a sudden, she searched for the right words to tell me how her sister was marrying another woman. Immediately, I could tell that she felt a little awkward and I cut her off and said, “Oh my gosh, I’m totally used to it, my aunt is also married to another woman.”
The mother didn’t care that her sister was marrying another woman, but she didn’t want me to be surprised to see two brides. Unfortunately, in the small town that I live in, that’s not the social norm. I could see the sense of relief on her face when I told her about my aunt, and we both laughed because, to us, this was completely normal.
It’s sad that we have to think of how people are going to react with situations like this. When introducing my aunts to people, I always try to think of the right words of how to tell them that my aunt is married to another woman. I even sometimes worry about what people are going to think. That’s the problem, though. We shouldn’t have to worry about what other people will think or how they are going to react.
Growing up, my aunt has always had a partner and has been a huge influence in my life. I have taken many trips to Provincetown with my family, so I have always been around the gay community. Because of this, I never found it abnormal that people were gay and I never understood (and still don’t) why some people think that it’s a big deal.
My aunts Tina and Mara are two of the most important people in my life. In fact, they are two of the coolest and most fun people I know. They have a beautiful house, great friends, they always know how to have a good time, they go on great vacations, and really just have a good life. What’s abnormal about that? Nothing.
So, the question that I have is this: why does it matter who other people love, and why do we sometimes feel a sense of awkwardness telling other people about our gay friends or family members? The truth is, we don’t know how other people are going to react to this, which is completely wrong. We shouldn’t have to worry about what other people are going to think or say. It's 2016, and same-sex marriage has been legal nationwide since June 2015.
I love that I have two awesome aunts. I am not ashamed about it whatsoever; I consider myself lucky to have two amazing women in my life. I love bragging to my friends about how awesome they are and what awesome lives they live. I really hope that one day all people will realize that being gay is nothing abnormal, and that it won’t be an awkward conversation worrying about how people are going to react.
The truth is, being gay is nothing abnormal. We have to stop thinking that this isn’t the ‘normal’ or ‘traditional’ way of living of life. Stop searching for those ‘right’ words to say to others, because nothing is abnormal about this situation.
Love yourselves. Love others. Love life.
