8 Basic Rules For Handling a Breakup
There's no denying that breakups can be really rough. Even if things end on good terms, breakups are always hard. Here are 8 basic rules to follow when going through a break up to make it a bit easier.
1. Give yourself a chance to be upset.
It is important to give yourself time to be upset. Time to reflect on what happened and what went wrong. There should be time for you to wallow. You should sit around and eat ice cream and watch movies and cry, but don't let that last too long. Be upset, but then begin to move on.
2. Don't keep in contact with them.
The point of a breakup is to get out of a relationship that was no longer doing any good for either person. So this is the time to keep your distance. You won't be able to move on if you keep texting them and stirring up the past. It's time to block/unfollow them on social media, whatever is best for you in the situation.
3. Throw their stuff away.
Keeping things that are a reminder of your relationship is never a good idea. If you hold on to stuff from a past relationship, you are keeping memories, both good and bad. This is something that will keep you from being able to move on fully. By getting rid of your ex's things, you are able to forget and begin to move on. Of course this is only the first step.
4. Don't talk about them.
When a breakup happens, it is best to distract yourself with other things. It is also best not to talk badly about your ex. True, it might make you feel better at first, but the more you dwell on them and talk about them, the harder it will be. Besides, talking about your ex makes it seem like you are not over it. Also it can make you seem immature and petty if you continue to say bad things about them. So it is best to just let it go and distract yourself.
5. Don't post about it.
Posting about a breakup is probably one of the worst things to do, because this kind of attention is not what either of you needs at a time like this. The best thing to do is to keep your relationship off of social media in the first place. Everyone goes through rough times in relationships, but putting a spotlight on them doesn't make it any easier.
6. Don't beat yourself up over it.
Relationships happen. Breakups happen. It's a part of life, and life goes on. There is no reason to sit around and think about what you did wrong, or what you could have done better, because it is simply over with and there is nothing more to do. I am a strong believer that, "Everything happens for a reason." This is not a failure on your part or your partner's part, only a failed relationship. Sometimes things in life just don't go the exact way that we want them to.
7. Don't try to find a rebound.
This is a rule that I cannot stress enough. A rebound is NOT going to help you. It can only make things worse. You will be upset and hurt, as will your ex. Rebounds are unfair to you and to the person you are using as a rebound, because you waste not only their time, but your own as well. It is much better to wait until you are ready for a new relationship so that you can fully appreciate it.
8. Give yourself some time
There is only one thing that can truly help you in a breakup: time. You need time to get over it and move on. Give yourself time to heal and to grow on your own. Give yourself time to learn how to love yourself, and in time you will be okay.
This breakup is not the end of you. You will be okay, and things will get better. Life will go on and, eventually, you will be okay again.
