7 Times Pixar Made You Cry, And Not In A Good Way
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7 Times Pixar Made You Cry, And Not In A Good Way

Those Times When Pixar Delivered All the Feels

7 Times Pixar Made You Cry, And Not In A Good Way

One of the most phenomenal contributors to popular entertainment in our lifetime has certainly been Disney’s Pixar. They are to the animated movie industry what Kanye thinks he is to the music industry. It seems like almost every movie they put out (with the exception of the Cars franchise) pushes the boundaries of technicality, wit and above all, stirring emotion. Whether it was Nemo reuniting with his father, or Woody letting go of Andy in Toy Story 3, Pixar has made us cry many times. Here are some classic Pixar moments that really turned on the waterworks...

1. When Cars happened.

Pixar was unstoppable in the late ‘90s and early 2000’s. Starting with Toy Story, they delivered a series of 6 brilliant animated classics that will forever stand the test of time. Then in 2006, this mediocre movie about a talking red car hit theaters and proved to us that nothing beautiful and perfect lasts forever, making you cry for hours without end.

2. When you realized the main character in Cars was voiced by Owen Wilson.

Lightning McQueen is a hotshot, conceited race car who lives life in the fast lane and oozes cool like my car oozes oil. To voice this car, they chose a guy best known for airy declarations of “oh wowwww” and an I-think-a-mosquito-just-landed-on-my-nose face who represents the exact opposite of the ideals portrayed in this racecar. Hearing Owen Wilson try to play the role of an egoistic über-celebrity was reminiscent of a 7th grader trying to flirt with an 8th grader. The disharmony made you cry.

3. When the next four movies after Cars were great, proving Cars was not going to set a precedent.

Pixar makes us cry tears of joy, too. When Ratatouille made an engaging and fun experience out of a very unique concept and setting, right before Wall-E grappled with extraterrestrial social commentary, UP touched our hearts, and Toy Story 3 proved that nostalgia can be fresh and exciting, the streak proved that Pixar still had it. It meant that Cars was just an undistinguished fluke in a legacy of otherwise incredible, nearly flawless films. You cried of relief during these four films due to their sheer superior quality to Cars.

4. When Cars got its own area in California Adventure.

You couldn’t stop bawling when you found out that Cars, that very same one which was set in a boring-ass gas station town, got its own area in California Adventure. The tears streamed down your cheek as you thought of how great it would have been to see a Wall-E thing, or like a Paris-themed set-up from Ratatouille. Would have been sick, but instead, of course, we got more Cars, which not only wasted opportunities, but also continued to validate this franchise which has served no other purpose beyond being the blip in an otherwise unblemished lineage of films.

5. When Cars 2 happened.

But Pixar is a wily group. They like to turn corners and defy expectations, so right when you thought everything was back on track, they went and pulled this bullshit involving the tow truck becoming an international spy. Everyone in every theater in America began weeping as this thinly-veiled attempt to make money off international audiences took $12 out of our wallets.

6. When goddamned Planes happened.

While it’s true that Planes was a Disney movie made independent of Pixar, it’s Cars’ damn fault for it happening. The concept is literally sticking the eyeballs and boring storylines of the cars onto planes in order to sell toys to kids so they can have something to drool on while they wait in line for a $20 churro at Disneyland. I remember when I first saw the ad for Planes, I cried such passionate, endless, angry tears that I had to go into exile for a week.

7. When they’re making a Cars 3?? WHAT THE HELL.

I don’t get it anymore. Pixar puts out these high-quality movies on a consistent basis like their shit don’t stank but are insistent on making Cars a thing. It’s like if LeBron were to randomly decide that in some games, he would scoot his ass on the floor with a makeshift oar and play pirate instead of basketball. It’s like if Leonardo da Vinci were to decide to dunk his entire head into a bucket of paint, sprint across the room, and slam his forehead onto an empty canvas instead of paint with a brush. Usually even when Pixar does mess up a little (i.e. Brave) they just count their losses and move on. But not with Cars. Why, why must they continue to shove Cars down our throat. We don’t want any more Cars. Please. We are done with Cars. I literally have not wept this much since I was born.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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