I've always been that little girl who dreamed of what my life would be like years in advance, the little girl who wanted to grow up fast. When I was 12, I was thinking ahead to 16; When I was 16, I was thinking ahead to 18. Now, here I am at 20, and I mentally feel like I am at least 25. This is for the people who know the struggle, and for the people who don't quite understand.
Things that happen when you are mentally older than what you really are..
1. You're Always Thinking Ahead
I mean, I'll be honest- I've had my life planned since I was like 11. I've always been thinking of where I will be at certain ages and when I'll get married, have kids, all of those things an eleven year old probably shouldn't be thinking about.
2. You're Extra Annoyed By Immature People
I'm not saying I've never been immature for my age; Trust me, my Timehop app makes me cringe. However, I grew up fast, and by the time I reached high school I had no patience for little kid games. I was ready for my graduation day the first day of freshman year.
3. You Were Ready to Move Out by Like.. Age 16
It's not that I didn't absolutely love my family and living with them, but I wanted my own apartment before I even reached college. I wanted out of the town I spent my whole life in thus far. I'll admit that I did have a lot to learn, and moving into a college dorm was a rude awakening for me, but I loved it. I love figuring things out on my own and feeling like I am in charge of myself. Laundry and cooking for myself was a struggle... but I got the hang of it- eventually.
4. You're Over the "College Life" by Sophomore Year
This makes me sound super boring, but yes, I am over it. Entering my junior year is frustrating because I feel like I already should be graduated and in my career already. I am over the binge drinking, and the going out every weekend, and meeting people who want one night stands. I want to be engaged or married, living in my cute little apartment and going out to my career everyday and coming home every night to cook dinner and watch Netflix. Wow, I really do sound boring.
5. When Things Like Grocery Shopping Excites You
I recently got super excited over buying new cleaning supplies for my suite and that's when I knew I was old.
6. You Always get the: "But You're Only 20..."
(Or whatever age you are). I hate this phrase. Yes, I am only 20 but I definitely don't feel like it. I feel like I know a lot for my age, and I definitely don't feel like I should be treated like anything less than an adult. Yes, I do have a lot to learn, and no, I don't know everything about the world yet. However, I am a person who is willing to learn, and a person who wants to learn on my own.
7. You Feel Like You're Growing Up Too Fast, but at the Same Time You're Just on a Totally Different Level Than Everyone Else
I did struggle with the idea that I was growing up too fast at a couple points in my life, but I came to peace with it now. I just realized that I am mature for my age, and that's okay. I know some people think that I need to slow down and enjoy my college years, but it's just not for me. I'm not saying that going out isn't fun and that I will never do it, but I just find more joy in spending time with close people that I love and to focus on more important things than parties and alcohol.. and that is okay.
If you are a person like me and you don't feel your age, trust me I know the battle all too well. Just do you and do what makes you happy. You are not boring. If laying in bed and watching Netlfix sounds more appealing than going out to a club 95% of the time, it is okay. If you're over college and you just want to be in your career field and be married already, it is okay. There are people like you out there, and we all know the struggle.
Hang in there.
