As a kid, I do not ever recall a time where I was afraid to be outgoing. At the slightest sign of attention, I instantly would soak it up like a sponge. If I ever saw a friend upset, I would do something goofy and make a clown out of myself just to see them laugh. Friends always came to me to have "serious talks" with.

I did not become acquainted with my new friend, social anxiety, until I became much older. I realized at the age of 14 that sometimes, I became afraid of things. I would shake at the thought of talking to someone. I feared rejection. Often I would clam up speaking in front of large crowds. I was not the outgoing kid I was just years earlier. Here are a few things people with anxiety want people to be aware of:

1. Do not mistake my quietness as being rude.

On occasion I ask my friends their first impression of me. Most cases, I get called a "friendly" five letter "B- word". No, do not mistake me being stand offish as me trying to be rude. I am a good person. I am nice. I just do not like small talk. It makes me super nervous. Want to chit chat? Text me.

2. Parties are a nightmare for me.

Or any social gathering for that matter. Yes, I might sit alone and pet your cat or dog, but do not mistake that as me not enjoying being at said party/ get together. I enjoy being out with my friends, just large crowds bother me. Again, the thought of small talk just makes me cringe.

3. Having to talk to someone I cannot see gives me a panic attack.

When my phone rings, most of the time, I get super panicked. If I do not answer the phone, more than likely I wasted the majority of my ringtone just staring at my phone trying to decide if I should answer or not. If all else fails, text me.

When it comes to business related issues, if there is an email I will use it. Calling places and hearing automated voices and selections literally makes my day. It means I do not have to go through the anxiety of having to find the right words and not sound like a total babbling idiot.

I once went a whole year without my anxiety medication because I was too afraid to go and ask for an appointment to see my doctor for a refill. Finally, I got up the courage to do it and still managed to sound like an idiot.

4. The same goes for drive thru's.

I will starve if I have to talk to someone through a little box. I will stutter, I will ramble, I will give up and just sit there in the seat and sulk. If I ask my friends to do it for me it is because I cannot stand the thought of talking to someone I cannot see. My heart beats a million miles an hour and sometimes I feel like my heart is going to push out of my throat. If I can avoid drive thrus and go in, I will.

5. If I do not know you and you offer me food/drink I will decline.

You know, because I do not want to be a bother. So, I will just sit here and shrivel up into a prune. I'll starve for hours and go back to my dorm or go home and eat. Speaking up for some reason just makes me feel bad. Not a logical thing to be afraid of, but I am.

6. Open discussions in class are not fun.

I cannot stand the thought of open discussions in my classes. The longer I am in school, the more often they tend to come up. I am OK with sharing my opinion, it just bothers me to think someone might disagree with me.

Finally, the most important one,

7. Do not try to "help me overcome it".

Please, for the love of all things good. Do not force me to do something I am uncomfortable doing and even say so. I know that it might come a good place, but overcoming social anxiety is something that has to be a self motivated thing. If you push me into going to a party and being social, I will back away from you. I will close up.

That is just how I am.Let me do it on my own, it is a journey, overcoming something like this. Not a quick plummet off a cliff.