7 Things To Remember & Do When The Unexpected Happens

7 Things To Remember & Do When The Unexpected Happens

The unexpected is an expected part of life, just roll with it.

As a twenty-year-old human being, I have embraced the fact that the unexpected always happens—it is an inevitable phenomenon. No matter what we do, we can never fully be prepared for this ambiguous and unknown occurrence. Here’s a great, all too fresh example:

Last weekend, I was in Pennsylvania with my mom and two aunts. It was a four-day trip before I began my senior year of college. On one of those days, we decided to drive to Philadelphia and spend the day there. While making a right turn, I felt something odd in the steering wheel—it was like I had to tug a little bit to make the steering wheel turn. This had never happened to me before. Moments later, I made a left turn and had the same problem, only this time, it was even harder to turn the steering wheel. Luckily, we had just turned into a parking garage in Philly, but let me tell you that even going up and around that garage was difficult. I had to pull with incredible force in order for the car to turn. Naturally, I started getting nervous. Long story short, my car had to be towed and taken to a shop so that a few parts could be replaced. From home, my father was able to rent us a car and my uncle, who lives an hour away from Philly, came to pick us up later on in the day.

My crazy mind automatically got nervous about the entire situation. All I could think about was the fact that my car and my family would be stuck in Pennsylvania and school was starting in just a few days. After surviving this weekend, I had the chance to think about how quickly my mind went to the worst-case scenario, rather than taking the situation moment by moment.

Here’s a list of the seven things that we should remember and do when the unexpected happens (and trust me, it will happen):

1. Before freaking out, pause for at least two minutes—get yourself away from the situation either mentally or physically.

I think it's human nature to automatically think of worst case scenarios when something goes bad. Why not think of best case scenarios? When something unexpected happens, you should move yourself away from the situation, however that may be. Give yourself time to process what is going on so that you are not clouded by anything. This will ensure that you make a better judgment call.

2. Seek counsel.

Everyone has their area of expertise. My dad happens to know a lot about cars! When we were in our recent jam in Philly, we gave him a call and he told us how to find the problem. I certainly didn't try to handle the situation myself—that would've made things worse. Instead, my mom and I spoke to several different people and got the situation under control. Find someone who can offer you the expertise or wisdom that you need.

3. Remember that these things are natural—they happen to everyone all the time. You’re not the only one.

The worst thing we can do is pull the "why me" card. Sure, it's easy to think that bad things only happen to us but that's certainly not the case. Although frustrating, I believe that these occurrences keep us humble and allow us to slow down a bit.

4. Have a good attitude, or else things will get worse.

This is much easier said than done, trust me, I know. But, keeping your head up and having a positive attitude can make most situations better instantaneously.

5. Remember that worrying about things does not add another day to your life—the moment might be intensely stressful or painful, but it won’t last forever.

In the moment, it might seem like your situation is never-ending. As I was standing in that garage in Philly, I felt like I was there for hours...it was only a forty minute ordeal but I swear, time stood still.

6. It’s a learning experience.

Grow. Whatever the situation and whatever the outcome, choose to grow from it. You can let the experience make you bitter or better...choose better.

7. When in doubt, think back to Dory's wise words:

And lastly, if you need an anthem to get you through those unexpected moments, listen to Bob Marley's classic, Don't Worry Be Happy.

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6 Things College Girls Can Do To Get Over That Boy That Does You Wrong

Boys can do you wrong, here's how to get over it.

How to get over that guy that’s just not That into you– or he could be into you, but not enough for your satisfaction or worth.

Unfortunately, I think we have all been there. You meet someone. You hit it off. You talk to them from time to time, or maybe all the time– you may even become top friends on Snapchat and earn the sought after yellow and then red heart. You may even hang out a few times and go home with each other after a night out. You talk about dating and liking each other– which if you’re like me, is not something you do often.You think things are going great, until they are not.

He may give you signs that he’s not that into you by casually pulling away. He could possibly ghost you, which if you don’t know (like I didn’t a few weeks ago), ghosting means just disappearing from your life with no warning. He may also continue to lead you on until he decides it’s convenient for him to tell you how he’s feeling. For me, I was in bed with him when he drunkenly confessed to me he was torn between me and another girl. LOL, BOY, BYE.

I was caught off guard, just like any other person who likes someone would be if they out-of-the-blue tell you that they don’t feel the same way or that they are into someone else. It sucked. At first, I was hurt. Next, I was pissed. After that, I quickly realized that I deserved better, or at least deserved someone who respected me enough to tell me in an actual sober conversation. I did the “two girl situation” in high school. It’s not fun. Worrying about whether or not someone will choose you is stressful and emotionally trying. I am in college to stress about homework and exams, not boys.

Things I have done that helped me, which could help you:

1. Cry

I am a crier. I hate to admit it, but I am. This is the best thing to do first if you’re like me. Go home, get in bed, and cry it out. Crying in your own bed will be much more comfortable than outside a bar at 1 am– yup, I did that.

2. Talk to a friend

I am not one that enjoys talking about my personal life with people; however, if this situation happens to you, talk to a friend!! If you have a guy friend, he’ll offer to beat up the guy for you, and if you have a girl friend, she’s going to empower the hell out of you until you realize you are better off.Both will make you feel better.

3. Realize it’s him, not you.

Cliché, but totally true. If a guy doesn’t want to be with you, it’s his own fault. He either doesn’t see your worth, doesn’t see you for all the amazing things you are, or could even be afraid of just how wonderful you are. It’s important to acknowledge that those are all his problems– not yours.

4. Hook up with someone else

I am saying hook up lightly. If you want to go mess around or have sex with a guy to get over the boy, you do you. Hooking up could also just mean meeting someone out. Go grab food with someone, dance with someone else or friends at a bar, just do something to distract yourself from the other boy. Honestly, this could either be successful and help you forget him, or make you miss him more, but it is worth a shot.

5. Remember it's okay to be sad

Depending on the situation, it could take you a little bit to be okay with the circumstances. Just remember that it is okay to feel whatever emotions you may feel. Slowly, it’ll start to get better.

6. Listen to an "ef boy" playlist

Seriously, get on Spotify, or whatever music source, and listen to music.

I found a play list called “f*ck boys”, and it was the best damn thing I have ever listened to. For real, music can make you feel all the feelings– and it can make you realize you are a strong, independent person who does not need anyone. (Personal favorites to jump start your playlist: ‘How to Be A Heartbreaker’ and ‘Lies’ Marina and the Diamonds, ‘Shout Out To My Ex’ Little Mix, ‘Picture to Burn’ Taylor Swift). Just find some music that channels the inner Beyoncé in you and forget about that person that did you wrong.

Cover Image Credit: Personal Photo

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California Girl Didn't See That Coming Now, Did She?

Rural has some new rules and I count them.

So, for most of my life, I lived in a small city in Southern California. The population was about 33,000 and compared to the surrounding cities that's is pretty low average. In August of 2017, I moved to Maine to attend the University Of Maine, Orono, which has an approximate population of 10,362. I knew there were going to be differences of course. I wasn't going to have a taco shop around every corner nor have the convenience of Disneyland only two hours away. Since it's a college town I expect some diversity, but not a whole lot. To my surprise, a lot of little things were astounding to me. Both good and bad, here are the weird differences that really stick out to me.

1. The bus schedule is ridiculously slow. You have to wait an hour or two for a bus when back home the next bus would be there in 15 minutes at most

2. Heavy Traffic in Maine is nothing compared to the morning rush in California.

3. The Dunkin' Donuts is basically like the Denny's chain in California. Every couple of miles and *BOOM* another one

4. The weird regional divides of northern, down east, and faux Massachusetts is weird, but coming from California to northern, southern, and bay area. I get the concept.

5. Whoopie pies and Moxie are not that great. I said it. Don't @ me

6. The number of people who want to go-live in a city. Why? I came here to escape. To each their own, but I'll never get the appeal of cities

7. The sheer beauty of the landscape honestly took my breath away. How awing is it to look out and see so much nature right outside?

Yeah, but living out here so far is amazing. I've met some pretty amazing people. Even though, it's a bit different from where I grew up. I'm sure I'll get the hang of it...eventually.

Cover Image Credit: Pixabay

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