Over the course of my lifetime, I've learned heartbreaking lessons on life, love, and being a woman. I've experienced smiles, tears, laughter, and I've passed many milestones, yet with more left ahead of me. When I reflect on my life, I realize that there was one person I'd always want to tell everything to-- about my day, how my exam was, the new boy I had met, and the new friends I had made. My mother and I don't always see eye to eye on all subjects under the sun, but at the end of the day, her presence in my life has made me a better woman for many reasons, with a few reasons listed below:
1. I learned that telling the truth hurts another person less than when they figure out you'd lied.
I'm sure you probably wouldn't disagree that when your mother puts the guilt trip on you, it really sucks. Whenever my mom would figure out that I had lied to her, she would be even more upset than if I had just told the truth in the first place. I learned that being honest is more important than trying to hide your mistakes because it can build the trust between you and another person rather than break it down.
2. Try to find the positive side out of even the most negative situations.
As a teenager I was frequently a negative person and I complained quite often to my mom about pointless things that were out of my control. My mom taught me that complaining about something uncontrollable is only a waste of energy, and that by thinking about the positive side of the situation could help me cope more effectively.
3. Sometimes the people you love can hurt you, but that's because they know you'll always be there for them.
I've hurt my parents on a number of occasions-- I've lied to them, broken their trust, and I've been ungrateful. But I always knew that despite the disappointment I gave them, they loved me unconditionally, and together they both made me a better person today. In the future, I know that I will be able to understand when my children hurt me, and that they might only be hurting me because they know I'll always be there for them like my mother is there for me.
4. Random acts of kindness can brighten your day and someone else's.
Being an only child at my mother's house, I was always showered with her total attention. Often she would give me small surprises on random occasions and especially on silly holidays such as Valentine's Day, when I would wake up to see that she had bought be flowers and chocolate and left them on my dresser in the morning as she headed off to work. I learned that to give is to receive, and there are many ways to show someone that you care and are thinking of them.
5. Take your children on your adventures and encourage their own adventures.
I have always been extremely fortunate to have a mother that always took me on trips and vacations with her. From a summer week at the beach to a weekend trip to see a baseball game, she has always worked hard to plan a vacation where I could go along. I have been across countries and states, and I've experienced many cultures that I otherwise wouldn't have thanks to my mother. Traveling at a young age has given me the taste of how exciting it is to try new places and spend time getting lost in order to find yourself.
6. Forgiveness is key in any relationship.
It's okay to argue with your mom sometimes, but what's important is that you forgive your indiscretions and talk it out. Many times I've raised my voice to my mother when there wasn't a reason to, and I've learned that having a mature conversation can lead to a better result than simply yelling through the emotions.
7. Make sure your future husband is also your best friend.
My mother has been remarried for 15 years and I have been blessed to be able to watch such a wonderful relationship grow between my mom and dad. I've learned that it's important to be best friends with your significant other before being just their lover. I've also learned that in the future, I need someone who is willing to try new adventures and stretch out of their comfort zone for me, as well as learning that I need to be able to support my husband when he needs me. My mom chose the perfect man to give her future decades of happiness, and she has taught me the importance of making a good marriage last a lifetime.
