Let’s all be honest: it’s a short person’s world. When you’re over 5’10’’ everything is just too short. Your jeans, your dresses, your skirts and even your yoga pants. Highwaters all day every day. You hope that it will get better once you get to college, but once you arrive, you find it’s just as short as everything else in the world. These are just a few of the struggles every tall person can be sure to experience in the best four years of their life.
1. You have to crouch in the shower.
Seriously, did they use a small child for the height on those shower heads? It almost seems to be worse in the newer buildings. You may be lucky to have the shower hitting your shoulders square on, but odds are that shower stream will be hitting you in the middle of your back. So. Refreshing.
2. Forget trying to run outdoors.
Trying to get in shape to lose weight? Then you better run on the treadmills or on the actual road. The facilities crew must have a clipping limit of 5’11’’, and then the people who live on campus must be in on it as well.
3. The school apparel never fits.
There’s always that rush of excitement whenever your school gets new apparel, and then there’s the rush of horrible disappointment when the large is still too short for our amazonian legs.
4. You constantly have to look out for anything hanging.
Promos for on-campus events, hall decorations in your dorms, and even lights at parties, if it’s dangling from the ceiling, your head will find it. Sometimes these bumps are harmless, but there are definitely other times that your noggin aches with those definitely-not-missed connections.
5. Everyone notices when you wear any type of heels.
“Oh my god, were you always that tall?” Yes. Literally always. Tall people don’t just grow three or four inches in two hours. If you are a party or even some work event, you can bet that someone will say something.
6. “You’re so tall! You should model”
Tall person does not equal a model. There are many types of tall people. Not all models are six feet tall, and not all tall people are models.
7. You’re constantly asked if you played basketball.
You might have. Once. But that was in middle school, okay? Not everyone who plays basketball is six feet tall. Height is not a requirement, it’s a perk.
Although it's hard being the BFG of the friend group, someone has got to do it. You can hide your food from your friends by putting it on top of cabinets. You also get the added bonus of having the best views at concerts while your shorter friends viciously jockey for a glimpse of what you're seeing.
