There are clearly so many reasons not to wear sunscreen, and using sunscreen is so not cool. Sunscreen is only something adults put on babies.

1. Sunburn

Who doesn’t love sunburn? Being red and in pain is just the best—especially when showering.

2. Sun poisoning

Swelling, dehydration, blisters, fever, nausea, dizziness, and headache? Hell yeah, bring it on!

3. Peeling skin

Nothing is more satisfying than having your skin peel after a nice sunburn. You leave little trails of flakes everywhere you go like Hansel and Gretel.

4. Sun blisters

Everyone loves sun blisters, especially on their lips. Who doesn’t love being in pain when trying to eat or talk?

5. Skin cancer

“According to the American Cancer Society, Melanoma will account for 73 percent of cases of invasive skin cancers in 2015.” How cool is that?!

6. Wrinkles

“High UV exposure can cause wrinkles to form by breaking down collagen and fibers in the skin.” Yes! Bring on the wrinkles and looking like old leather ASAP!!!

7. Sped-up aging

Sun exposure speeds up the aging process. Screw looking young and having healthy skin, am I right?

Okay, at this point, I’m sure you’ve realized this article has been sarcastic up until this point, but I just wanted to stress the importance of wearing sunscreen. NO ONE is “too cool” for sunscreen. Being unhealthy and not taking care of your body is not cool at all.

You can still get tan while wearing sunscreen. People always say “well I’m always tan after I burn.” Cool, but you can completely avoid all of the side effects of getting burnt if you just put on some sunscreen. Throwing on 30 SPF (or above) sunscreen protects your skin, and still allows you to get tan. It may take SLIGHTLY longer, but it’s so worth it in the long run.

Use sunscreen chapstick! It will keep your lips moisturized and protect them from the sun. Way too many people overlook their lips when going outside. Your lips are skin, too. They are important and require proper care as well.

Any time you know you’ll be outside, you should have some form of skin protectant on. There are many lotions (available at every drugstore) that have SPF in them already. You can be protected every time you leave your house, even if you’re just running errands. Some foundations also have SPF in them, as well!

The sun has many health benefits, such as increased mood, better sleep, stress relief, vitamin D, etc. You can still enjoy these benefits while wearing sunscreen and staying protected.

You shouldn’t have to compromise your health in order to look tan. Just use sunscreen.