7 Reasons Getting Married Young Was The Best Decision I've Ever Made

7 Reasons Getting Married Young Was The Best Decision I've Ever Made

Apologies accepted.

We started dating when I was 16-years-old. She was 15. We dated through most of our years of high school and witnessed our fair share of eye rolls at what people perceived to be young, naive infatuation. And who knows, maybe it was. I was 20 when we announced our engagement and the rumors started flying: were we pregnant? How long could our marriage possibly last? They don't know what they're getting themselves into!

While some of our friends and family were genuinely excited for us, we were also met with a steady stream of criticism and thinly veiled judgment, as if our minds could not possibly be developed enough to make such a weighty commitment. Looking around at my 18 to 20-year-old friends I suppose I can see why. The biggest problem I had with the conversations leading up to our marriage was that people seemed to think we were doing something unnatural, that we were somehow endangering ourselves. For us, however, marriage seemed not only natural, but logical. We were already paying the majority of our tuition and living expenses ourselves, we shared our time and money, and were ready to make life decisions as a team. Over the four years leading up to our marriage we had formed a steady, dependable relationship where we were free to be our goofy, stressed-out, sometimes unhygienic selves without fear of losing each other over something trivial. We were more confident, more outgoing, more positive, and more fun to be around as a couple than we had ever been as single people. Now, nearly four years into our marriage, I can confidently say that we made the right decision. Getting married at 18 and 20 added some unique perks to our lives, such as:

1. We watched each other grow up.

Even though I married my high school sweetheart, it feels like I've been married to five or six different women. My wife's phases and preferences, like mine, have varied widely from year to year, making our time together anything but mundane. I've watched her form and reform about a dozen different identities from science nerd to girly girl to punk to otaku. She's a comedian, then she's a critic. She's a Pinterest homemaker, then she's an expert on GMO-free fast food. Sometimes she's all of them. Meanwhile, I spent countless hours adventuring through the entertainment industry, picking up small jobs as a model, photographer, actor, writer, music critic, stagehand, book nerd, and construction worker. The point is that we were there to experience many of the countless contributors to each of our worldviews and personalities. When she does something weird, I can usually see why.

2. We changed together.

One of the many pieces of advice we were given in our early years is to expect change. While each of us were going through different stages of life, we were usually conscious of how those changes were affecting the other person. When I realized that driving all over the place chasing film work was keeping me from spending time with my wife, I switched over to something that would keep me closer to home. When she saw my love for video games, she gave them a try and looked for games we could play together. We started looking for new experiences that we could both enjoy and formed an identity of our own as a couple.

3. It was easier to go to college.

Weird, right? I usually hear people saying things like, "I have enough to deal with in class, I don't think I could be married right now." In my life, being married made college easier. My financial aid was based on our income (which was close to nothing) instead of our parents' income (who were not paying our tuition). Having a home together, a safe place to come back to, allowed my mind to recenter itself every day. I felt like no matter how I did in class or how my job was going, we would still have an enjoyable and successful life together. I had someone by my side asking my about my classes and making me form more solid thoughts on them than I probably would have otherwise.

4. It removed the stress of dating/looking for someone.

I do not envy single twenty-somethings, at least the ones that are looking. The insecurity and uncertainty I see in so many of my peers seems like it would make life pretty difficult. As a happily married person, I haven't really felt pressured to impress anyone. My life and thoughts hardly depend on the opinions of the people I see in class or in social settings because the health of my marriage is what truly affects my happiness. I felt no need to attract the attentions of the opposite sex, and was able to focus on my projects far better than I would have as a single person (maybe that's just me).

5. Divorce was out of the question.

I don't mean that we are just such good people that we'd succeed no matter what. I'm talking about the practical feasibility of a divorce. Everything we had built in our adult lives, we had built together. There was nothing to return to but college dorms or our parents' houses. For us, being young and married also meant that we were totally broke. Divorce costs time, money, and a whole lot of heartache, none of which we had the luxury of sparing. Instead of running to the idea of a breakup when we had our spats, we wrestled with how to fix (or just live with) the problems so that we could get back to our peaceful little life.

6. We got more attractive.

At 20 years old I was still a scrawny, baby-faced, sometimes-acne-ridden man-boy. We were both still relatively new to our adult bodies. It had never occurred to me that the woman I was marrying would keep getting hotter. I guess I'd always just thought of us both getting older, balder, and wider, but our looks have really taken a turn for the better (in my opinion) as we moved through our early twenties.

7. We're healthier for it.

Having someone who cares about your health is honestly pretty irritating. It means I gave up my Mountain Dew habit. It means she doesn't pour on the salt whenever she sits down to eat. It means that I can't stay up until three every morning playing Playstation without hearing an indignant why are you even awake right now? from the bedroom. When I have the option of going to a loud party full of small talk or cooking some dank food and watching a sweet new Netflix original, I choose to stay home every time. We eat better, sleep more, and do less stupid/dangerous things (ok, that one is all me) than we ever did before. Because at the end of the day we know someone cares about us and they'll have to deal with our messes if we make them.

Cover Image Credit: Kaleb Eisele

Popular Right Now

14 Inspirational 'Winnie The Pooh' Quotes For College Kids Feeling Like Eeyore

Of course he with the help of his friends.


Winnie the Pooh and his friends were my best buds as a child. Now, as a college student, I've realized they knew more about life than I thought.

These 14 quotes from the 'Winnie the Pooh' movies, TV shows, and books, is getting me through this difficult semester, and maybe it will help you, too.

"You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think." -Christopher Robin

"The nicest thing about rain is that it always stops. Eventually." -Eeyore

"The things that make me different are the things that make me." -Piglet

"It never hurts to keep looking for sunshine." -Eeyore

"Rivers know this: there is no hurry. We shall get there some day." -Winnie the Pooh

"Don't underestimate the value of doing nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can't hear, and not bothering." -Piglet

"Could be worse. Not sure how, but it could be." -Eeyore

"Spelling isn't everything. There are days when spelling Tuesday simply doesn't count." -Rabbit

"There's no difference between falling a thousand feet to the jagged rocks below and tumbling out of bed." -Tigger

"People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day." -Winnie the Pooh

"I always get to where I'm going by walking away from where I have been." -Winnie the Pooh

"To the uneducated, an A is just three sticks." -Eeyore 

"You can't stay in your corner of the forest waiting for other to come to you. You have to go to them sometimes." -Piglet

"When you are a bear of very little brain, and you think of things, you find sometimes that a thing which seemed very thingish inside you is quite different when it gets out into the open and has other people looking at it." -Winnie the Pooh

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

Music Review: Greta Van Fleet, "Anthem of the Peaceful Army"

The best rock album of the year.


Greta Van Fleet is a rock band with a classic rock sound. But what is so amazing is that the four members, 3 of which are brothers, are between the ages of 19 and 22. You have Josh, the lead singer; Jake, who plays guitar; Sam, who plays the bass and piano; and Danny, who plays the drums. They just released their first full album this year, back in October. I have been waiting for this album for so long and it is just so awesome! I love it. I ordered a vinyl record when it was released and it is amazing. This is a breakdown of each song, and what you can expect from each one.

1.​ Age Of Man

Age Of Man: This is the opening song of the album. The song starts off slow, but it reminds me of something mystical. The lyrics of the whole song remind me of an oral story that is being told from an elder to the younger people about how we as people have come about. Josh's vocals are just amazing in the chorus, he can really belt! Overall I think this is a great song, and it's a great opening to what these guys want to tell.

2. The Cold Wind

The Cold Wind: This song is just so fun. Sam does an amazing job in the bass in this song. It sounds so intricate and really adds a lot to this song. Furthermore, Jake's little guitar solo is so fun. One thing that is starting to grow on me about this song is the vocals in the middle of the song where Josh is just saying "Ma ma ma ma ma…". It sounds a little funny and the first time I heard it I actually laughed out loud because it reminded me of a confused dodo bird. But the more I listen to it, the more I like it because it's just such a fun thing. This is the kind of song that I can just stupidly dance around to and have fun with it.

3. When The Curtain Falls

When The Curtain Falls: I actually had this song stuck in my head for the past few nights while trying to sleep, which was interesting. But this song is so fun. Just every aspect of this song, from the vocals to the guitar, to the drums, to the bass, perfectly melds together to create this masterpiece. Also, Jake does a sick guitar riff. Like I am blown away! Just so good.

4. Watching Over

Watching Over: We're slowing it down again. But it has a psychedelic feel to it. This song is much more serious than some of the other ones. The chorus really hits on the point how much we have ruined our planet, but we don't want to see it or fix it because many people are acting like it's fine. Kind of a deep and depressing song, but so relevant and thought provoking. A very interesting detail that I hope you hear when listening to this, it kind of freaked me out the first time I heard it, but during the part when Josh sings, "With the water rising" you can hear like a deeper voice singing it too. Perhaps it's the one watching over?

5. Lover, Leaver

Lover, Leaver: This song is one of my favorites. It reminds me of a 70s song because of the way the instruments come together. It gives a feeling of Woodstock and nostalgia. Furthermore, the lyrics are a fun play on words. For example, "Lover, leaver" sounds like "love her, leave her". I don't know if they meant for that to happen, but it just adds a bit extra to the song. The ending is mind boggling. Danny does an amazing job on those drums. I can only imagine how tiring it must be.

6. You're The One

You're The One: This song is just so cute and loving. Sam does a great job on the piano, which adds a lot of character to the song. It sounds like a song I've heard before, like this could be a cover to an older song, but I can't find anything about it. Obviously they've done a good job achieving that older sound if I think it sounds like an older song. This is a great song and I highly recommend this song if you want something a bit more relaxed and loving.

7. The New Day

The New Day: I love this song. It makes me feel so inspired to just go out and love people. The opening line, which is my favorite, just says it all, "Let the new day shine its light on me". What a powerful opening line! However, there's a line that says, "You're growing up I'll watch you bloom" but I always think he's saying "You're throwing up". I think that's just a "me problem", but it makes the song a bit funnier. Anyway, I feel like a flower child when I listen to this song, and that's all I want in life. I hope that this song inspires you too and that you wake up each day with a fresh start.

8. Mountain of the Sun

Mountain of the Sun: Another great song. This is an awesome song to listen to while hiking or just out and about. The opening guitar sounds so cool, and makes you feel like you're on a journey. Josh's voice is just so incredible, but it really shines in this song. Jake has an awesome riff in this song, and one of my favorite parts is when they use the tambourine. It's such a simple sound, but it adds another layer to this song.

9. Brave New World

Brave New World: This song is much darker than the others, in respect to both content and sound. This song again reflects on the damage that we have done to this earth, but a more social commentary on it. One of my favorite lines of the song is "kill fear, the power of lies For we will not be hypnotized" because fear is a powerful thing, and fear is a liar. It makes us believe lies that we tell ourselves or that we hear from others. Once you realize this, you will not give in to fear and you will know the truth. Again, Jake has an amazing rift near the end and Sam does some awesome things with the bass. They just kill it every time.

10. Anthem

Anthem: This song is personally one of my other favorites. It's one of their slower songs but it ties the whole album together since it is the "Anthem" of the Peaceful Army. The song talks about how there are so many problems in the world and everyone has different opinions, but we should "agree to disagree" on our opposing views and just love each other. This is a chill song. It almost has a tropical feel to it, so you feel so relaxed.

11. Lover, Leaver (Taker, Believer)

Lover, Leaver (Taker, Believer): This is an extended version of "Lover, Leaver" and it is just as amazing. It's a bit longer because there is more of a rif in the middle. You get so much more from all of the members. You just have to listen to this song because they all just do such an amazing job making this song even more perfect, which I didn't even know was possible.

Related Content

Facebook Comments