As the world and internet work together to serve a lot of news at once that leaves you biting off more than you can chew, remembering past stories can be difficult. To freshen your memory, let me remind you who Logan and Jake Paul are.
These brothers hail from Westlake, Ohio, and before skyrocketing into YouTube stardom they got their start from now deactivated app Vine. They have amassed not only insane subscription counts but also a significant amount of controversy, more severely so older brother Logan Paul when he uploaded a video in January of his trip through Japan's Aokigahara forest, also known as the Suicide Forest due to the number of people who visit the forest to take their own lives. While filming, he and his friends found a body of one recently deceased victim and continued to film it, with Logan squeezing in some commentary on how suicide is no joke only to make a joke minutes later. He apologized, proceeding weeks later to upload a video of him tazing dead rats.
His younger brother, Jake, while never uploading content as controversial, still released videos that grinded people's gears with his over the top vlogs and laughable music videos. The tone of his channel shifted a bit on March 12 when he uploaded a video titled "It’s Time To End School Shootings." In it, he talked to Parkland students from Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School, parents of those children, and Marco Rubio. Yes, Republican senator Marco Rubio who once ran for president against Donald Trump.
I am aware that Jake and Logan's audience demographic lean more toward the prepubescent crowd, and mine, for the most part, does not, so I may not convince anyone to stop watching the Paul brothers. However, I can convince people to avoid watching them in the first place and instead engage in some more meaningful activities.
Think of this list as an introduction to self care.
1. Go for a walk.
Around your block, through your house, or up and down your room, just put one foot in front of the other. You never know how badly you will need it.
2. Take deep breaths.
We humans have to breathe so much all the time, and we forget that more than we think. So inhale with that diaphragm and exhale through the mouth.
3. Send that email.
You know the one.
4. Listen to a podcast.
Go out and be that person who says "I was listening to this podcast that..." or "You should listen to this podcast about..." because life is short. Be that guy.
5. Craft a poster for a protest.
Missed March for Life? A different justice march will appear soon. If not...
6. Lead a march.
Gather a group and take to the streets about an issue you believe needs to be amplified. There has to be something that ruffles your feathers, but if you want to get people together for other reasons, then...
7. Start a Facebook event, serious or nonsensical.
Create a bar crawl where everyone has to dress up as host of The Situation Room and CNN news reporter Wolf Blitzer and get blitzed as Blitzer. Not a fan of alcohol or too young to drink? Host a food crawl where you visit every taco place in your local area. You could also make a Facebook event where everyone gives their best Owen Wilson impression by saying 'wow.' Yes, that is a real event.
8. Blink a lot.
No harm in preventing dust from entering your eyeballs.
9. Watch a Netflix documentary.
This streaming services gives labor to documentaries the same way rabbits breed. So go watch one. You might learn something new and insightful, unlike anything the Paul brothers produce.
10. Give a different YouTuber your subscription.
YouTube offers more than dumpster fires. There are hundreds of video content creators (or influencers) worth watching. It will not take long to find yourself a promising candidate.
11. Read a magazine.
Grab one from the doctor's office or on your way out of the grocery store. Any magazine should suffice for a decent time.
12. Buy from a small business.
Always support local businesses. Those Mom and Pop shops have mouths to feed.
13. Download an audio book.
If your bank account cannot afford Audible, like myself, you can always record yourself or a really good friend reading a book and listen to it later. The future is now, and friends are fantastic.
14. Make a smoothie.
I would make more smoothies if I had the funds. The wonderful part about blenders is that you can blend anything together, no matter how disgusting people think it is. So tell me how good that Nutella pickle ginger swiss smoothie is. Leave me a review.
15. Listen to your local symphony orchestra.
Hear me out. My local city's orchestra hosted a symphony mashup called Tchaikovsky V. Drake, and while I missed out, I am sure it sounded amazing. Before you knock the orchestra as a snoozefest, think of going to your local music hall this way: you will be supporting local business and artists. It goes beyond "getting cultured." Classical music reaches people in multiple ways, so go see what it does to you.
16. Learn how to shuffle a deck of cards.
Guaranteed your coolness factor will increase ten thousand fold. Just wait until you get to college and somebody in your freshman dorm room asks who can shuffle the cards for kemps or spoons. How else would you make friends?
Confession: I cannot shuffle a deck of cards well so please do not take my previous statement seriously.
17. Scour your social media feed for fresh memes.
Another way to find and make the right group of friends is analyzing their reactions to memes you send. Find timely, not yet oversaturated memes to prove you are a certified hip dude.
18. Finish your homework.
You have homework to do. There is ALWAYS homework to finish. If you are a lucky soul done with school, I am sure a deadline for work looms over your head, so get a head start on that.
19. Change your hair style.
Splurge on a nice hairdo, or if pennies are pinched, dye your own hair. Cut your own bangs. New year new you? No. New day, new you.
20. Attend a concert.
Who hates music? No one. No one is the answer. A study from Australia found that people who attend concerts regularly generally carry happier vibes, so go listen to some sick beats.
21. Play an online game with some internet friends.
From Town of Salem to Cards Against Humanity online, the internet is full of free multiplayer games where you can acquaint yourself with strangers from the internet, for better or for worse.
22. Ask your friends how their days went.
Show them you care. Even listen to their dream from last night or a recap of the latest TV episode that you do not watch but they do. What else are good friends for?
23. Ask your friends what they would call their YouTuber fanbase if they were famous.
I find this question very entertaining because it warrants a lot of funny thought provoking answers. Personally, I have no answer for myself, but hopefully you might after reading this!
24. Pick up a new hobby.
Need help choosing what to do? See number 28.
25. Debate whether shorts are pants.
Fun at parties. Also, shorts are short pants therefore shorts are pants.
26. See a movie.
Check your local theater for the cheapest possible tickets for the most talked about film. Or go see Black Panther. I already saw it in theaters twice.
Nothing wrong with catching some ZZZ's.
28. Start geocaching.
Want to go treasure hunting in your neighborhood? You can by geocaching, which involves looking for containers via a GPS system. Once you find the treasure, you write your name on a provided piece of paper. Most have these. Just remember to explore safely.
Working out makes your body feel good, even if your lazy mind screams otherwise. Your routine could be as simple as hitting the treadmill for ten minutes. No one is asking you to do crossfit, unless people are, which in that case, ignore them.
30. Read up on some myth-debunking articles about United States history.
You never truly realize how many lies about American history we were told in grade school until you come across a college class, cable TV program, or the internet. For example, did you know that accused women and children during the Salem witch trials were never burned at the stake? Not a single recorded instance. There were witch trial tests to determine if the accused was indeed a witch but no method included being tied and burned. The more you know.
31. Scroll Amazon endlessly for stuff you do not need.
....Guilty as charged.
32. Cook a meal.
At least, attempt to cook a meal. Take the necessary precautions you need, even if it means Googling and re-Googling how to cook steamed broccoli.
33. Treat yourself to a nice meal out on the town.
So maybe your home cooked meal made Chef Gordon Ramsey cry on Twitter. Save a few dollars over a week and take yourself out to a dinner you know will taste delicious.
34. Apply a face mask.
With a rising popularity in face masks, thanks to (probably) millennials, face masks can be found in nearly any store that sells cosmetics and at reasonable prices. From $1.50 for one at Walmart to a pack of 16 for $9.39 on Amazon, the promises of a happy, healthy face can be found everywhere.
If suggestion #2 was too easy for you, we can move on to ADVANCED REALAXATION, otherwise known as meditation. Read up on some Thich Nhat Hanh or Google a guided meditation video. All of us can afford to stop and take a breath. You know what? Throw some yoga in the mix too if you are really the adventurous type.
36. Cry over an album.
Lord knows I have. Honestly? It cleanses me more than deep meditation or a detox ever could. Thank you, Emotion by Carly Rae Jepsen.
37. Make a move on Words with Friends.
A person can only nudge for so long until they feel annoying, so do your opponent a solid and take your turn, Brian.
38. Tune in to the radio.
Since attending a relatively isolated college, I stopped listening to the radio which made me fall behind on current Top 40 trends. I also enjoy listening to a local radio's alternative music station in the hopes of falling in love with a new song or band. Just take 15 minutes, an average commute, and search for some stations. You never know what you might hear.
39. Educate yourself on conspiracy theories or unsolved murder cases.
While more a fan of the latter, both conspiracy theories and criminal-less cases provide for a thoroughly entertaining read whether it is on your own, at a slumber party, or with your significant other. Maybe you read or hear about them with your family, gather around a TV screen like they used around radio shows in the 30s. You do you. Who am I to judge?
40. Draw. Or doodle.
Anything will do. Pencil to paper, pen to tablet, chalk to board, paint to canvas, whatever you feel like doing. You only need to impress yourself, so who cares how awful of an artist you are? That is what I tell myself.
41. Publish a list about what to do instead of watching Logan and Jake Paul.
Time well spent, if I do say so myself.