"Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination of full hope." — Maya Angelou
When it comes time to get married (whenever you happen to do so), you'll find that suddenly everybody has something to say or rather alarming opinions on your love life/relationship, how you'll choose to get married and generally your choices up until this magical point in your life. Who are they to judge how you live? Well, you might find that these people come in the forms of parents, siblings, future in-laws, aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, friends and everyone in between. Although it's hard not to take these criticisms to heart, you'll want to try and respectfully decline their forms of advice/belittlement (let's be real). Even though you might feel like putting them in their place, just remember that, regardless of age, every bride receives criticism regarding her wedding day. Some famous lines while under inevitable wedding planning stress may appear like this:
1. "You're getting married? Why so soon?"
Like the famous Maggie Gyllenhaal shown above, you are a human woman and therefore entitled to make a decision about your own wedding in your own life. This may come as a surprise to those who render this line, but maybe people don't always want to wait for everyone in their life to be "ready" for them to get married (because then you never will be). If you're both in love and ready to take the plunge, it should be up to the couple to decide when the right time to get married is.
2. "Are you pregnant? Is that why you're getting hitched in a hurry?"
What crazy assumptions people have in their heads. Whether the bride-to-be looks pregnant or not, you don't have to be pregnant or have a kid to want to get married sooner rather than later. It's not a requirement. Regardless of a bride's fertility situation, getting pregnant is not always the reason most couples decide to get married so quick. Maybe they just want to be married. Ever thought of that? So to answer your question, yes, I am getting married young. No, I am not pregnant.
3. "Why wasn't *insert name here* invited to your wedding?"
Oh, the hypocrisy. People who ask this question should first be faced with this one: Would you invite someone you don't like, talk to or know well to come to your wedding if you're footing the *insert dollar amount per head* bill? No, you wouldn't. So why make someone else answer that question. If you don't pay, you have no say.
4. "You're not having a church wedding?"
Not everyone gets married in the same way or at the same types of venues. Though weddings and marriages are considered "a holy covenant" or a "holy ceremony," it does not mean everyone must get hitched in the holy house. If it's summer, which is considered to be "wedding season" many people opt for an outdoor wedding near a lake or on top a mountain, etc. Not all weddings are cookie cutter stereotypes (and to have a special one, they shouldn't always be).
5. "You're drinking/not drinking at the wedding?"
Weddings, first and foremost, are celebrations/parties. Some people choose to "celebrate" in different fashions. Some drink, some don't. No matter what they're choice is you can choose not to partake in either one, so the choice is left up to you ultimately and therefore you shouldn't complain either way. If it was your "party" you'd want things your way too.
6. "I give it *insert time frame here* until they divorce."
In terms of famous wedding lines, this is the mother of all insults. While at something as formal as a wedding, you would do well not to look like a classless drunk at a roulette table. It's the most insensitive remark you could make and above all, it's not okay if you are going to a wedding in the name of someone who you truly care about. In conclusion, you should never bet on someone's life choice or the chance of there ever being a divorce (because obviously if you're getting married your intention should be to stay with them forever).
There are a lot of wedding rules and guidelines out there to follow, but the most important one I think people would do well to remember is that if you don't have something nice to say (especially to the bride-to-be), don't say it at all (if anything, do it to avoid Bridezilla!). No one in the world needs more support than the wedding couple themselves, so any constructive advice you can give to the newlyweds or those about to get married is beneficial. When you're young on top of that, it's hard not to be judged by your age and lack of experience. Be supportive, be a friend and most importantly, love them for making a commitment and choosing to be happy.
Happy wedding season!
