Friendships and relationships can be very similar. They’re all about you and another person being there for each other, doing fun things together, and growing together as people. However it can be much harder to realize when a friendship has reached the end of its rope, or become toxic, and that it is time to move on. These are six of the biggest red flags when it comes to knowing when to walk away from a bad friendship.
1. You only ever do things they want to do.
You find yourself constantly at events you didn’t really want to attend, but your friend did. When you invite them to do something that interests you but not them, they always have a quick excuse or cancel last minute.
2. They do not support your endeavors.
They never show up to your basketball game/recital/art show even when you remind them over and over again of the date. They show no interest in the things you do, and aren’t concerned with being there to support you. It’s even worse if they tell you they find what you do boring or stupid.
3. They are “brutally honest” all the time
They often say incredibly rude things to you, quickly followed by the familiar line, “What, I’m just being really honest!”. They aren’t just being honest, they are being mean. While honesty is a part of any healthy relationship, things like telling you that the person you’re really into is unattractive, or that maybe you shouldn’t have that dessert, are just tearing you down.
4. You are their personal therapist
You spend most of your time together listening to them vent about all the things that are going on in their life. They have a hard time looking at the bright side of things, and like to complain to you about every little thing that is going wrong. While of course venting and complaining are healthy parts of a relationship, it is all they seem to ever want to talk about. When the conversation becomes about you and your life they are uninterested or find a way to steer things back to themselves.
5. They try to get you to do things you’re uncomfortable with
We’ve all been told countless times to avoid peer pressure, but it can be hard to recognize it when it is coming from one of your friends. They are constantly trying to get you to join in on activities they know you are not comfortable with. They don’t take no for an answer and will guilt you for not joining in. They seem to not be able to understand or respect your desire not to partake.
6. You start avoiding them for no reason
You find yourself groaning when you see their name light up on your phone, or you take a different route to class one day so you don’t have to stop and chat with them. You can’t pinpoint one exact reason you are avoiding them, you just know that you don’t want to be around them for the foreseeable future.
If you have noticed any (or all) of these things going on in your friendship, it might be time to take a step back and reevaluate. Friend break-ups can be incredibly difficult, but you will be better off for it in the long run.
