“Too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears.”
Anxiety. That is one word, especially in college, that gets thrown around just like every other word. Do these people know how sensitivethat word is? Do they realize how many people battle with that word every single day of their lives? People who have anxiety live every day in fear, and you will never hear them talk about it. I know for me, that is one topic I always like to avoid. Anyone can tell you facts about a mental illness from things they found on social media or the internet, but only someone who has been through it can tell you the real, ugly, truths about them.
1. It is not to be confused with stress.
In college, we CONSTANTLY pull all-nighters for that 20 chapter biology test we "forgot" to study for. Throughout the library you hear, "Ugh this class gives me anxiety," or, "I would rather kill myself than take this test tomorrow." Here's the thing, anxiety is a mental illness that affects millions of people a year. That feeling you get when you realize you enrolled in a class that is impossible to pass, or when you realize there is no chance of you passing a single test in the class, is called stress.
Stress comes and goes. It does not affect the way you live daily life. Anxiety is a bully inside of your mind. It is constantly telling you that you CAN'T do something, that you are NOT good enough, and that you will NEVER succeed in anything you do. It constantly is nagging and it never goes away. Stress just makes the anxiety in people a thousand times worse than it already is. You are in a constant battle with your mind, that makes you feel like you will never win.
2. It is a jokester.
There are days where you feel on top of the world, so determined that you beat that little thing in the back of your head. You are the happiest you have ever been and you feel so determined that you don't need that anxiety medication anymore. But guess what? Jokes on you! The very next day you are back to square one, right where you started, and that little thing is still nagging at your mind. It is more frustrating than anything, and you feel as though you will never defeat this thing. You are not the only one that feels this way, anxiety tricks everyone. That is what it is best at.
3. It makes you feel so alone, even when you are surrounded by hundreds of people.
This is one of the funny things about anxiety. You could be in a crowded room, concert, or at your favorite place in the whole world with all the people you love. You still feel like you are the only person in the entire place and that you are so alone. There is absolutely no explanation for this feeling. It is a feeling people with this illness know way too well and still can't seem to get away from.
4. It is having an anxiety attack if one little thing is out of place or bothers you.
Shortness of breath, sweaty palms, stomach pains, and a pounding heart. Those are the symptoms of an anxiety attack. One moment you feel fine, the next, you feel your world crashing down, your mind going a mile a minute, and like you are going to pass out. One little trigger from the environment around you can send you into a scary, out of control, full on, anxiety attack.
5. It is people not understanding what life is like with a mental illness.
"You are crazy." "You need serious help." "Just get over it." Oh man, if only it was that easy. People do not understand that this is a serious disease that can easily make someone go crazy, or even, end their life over. In the big picture of things, it seems as though anxiety is so little and barely has an impact on one individual. This is not something that just goes away on its own. It is taking pills every morning, it is many therapy sessions, and it is telling yourself that everything is going to be OK every single day.
Individuals with anxiety or any other mental illness are FIGHTERS. They are some of the strongest people on this Earth. If others could accept each other for who they are no matter what the circumstances, this world could be such a beautiful place. Ones who are going through this, you are NOT alone. You CAN do this. Keep fighting.