Remember when you would fall asleep in the car on the way home or on the couch when you stayed up too late watching Disney Channel? But somehow, by some magical force (and I mean Dad), you would wake up in your bed?
Being a kid was the best.
Now we’re growing up, we’re starting college or getting big kid jobs or internships (umm excuse me, three months ago I had to ask to go to the bathroom). We’re expected to do bigger and better things. We’re supposed to be responsible, take care of ourselves and our loved ones, and to pay for our own food (WHAT). The ages of 18-22 are a weird time. You’re stuck somewhere between living with your parents and being totally independent—it’s super confusing. You’re supposed to be living the most free years of your life, but if you fool around too much people tell you it’s time to “grow up.” We are the inbetweeners, the almosts & the maybe somedays.
So what do you do? How are you supposed to become an adult in the span of a year? What does it even mean being "grown up"? Well, here’s some advice from a fellow “almost”:
1) Nobody Knows What They’re Doing
You’re not the only one, so don’t panic. Most of life is just pretending you know things and figuring them out as you go along. You learn as you go and there definitely isn’t an “Adults for Dummies” handbook you can pick up at the library. So if you’re totally and completely lost, I guarantee you’ve got friends in the boat.
2) It’s Not What You Think
Being an adult doesn’t mean you have to stop sliding down wooden floors in your socks, mattress surfing, or eating junk food for dinner. It does mean taking care of the other things every once in awhile, too. Don’t limit yourself—as taught by my goofy uncles and father, the definition of “adult” varies by person.
3) You’re Not Supposed to Know Who You Are
To me, the definition of “who I am” has always been extremely fluid. As said earlier, we change as we grow. If you’re not changing, you’re not growing. You are under no obligation to be the same person you were five minutes ago. Don’t be content with the high school-you. This goes for the BIG kids, too (I’m looking at you moms & dads). Keep looking for ways to grow, for new adventures, and allow yourself to experiment and experience change. “Who You Are” is not some tattooed definition inked into your forehead but rather written on a dry erase board in your heart.
4) The Most Important Thing to Remember is to Breathe
In the midst of adult life comes stress and panic about the impending future. It might be the giant exam tomorrow or, if you’re me, it’s stress about not being able to provide what you want to provide for your future fam. Have faith in whatever you have faith in, prepare as you can, and take things as they come. Breathe. It’s going to turn out okay.
5) The One Thing That Should Totally, Definitely, 100% Change About You If You Were This Kind Of Person Before, Which You Might Not Have Been
As the young, immature, childish toddlers that adults think we are, the most important thing to remember is to support other people. Jealously, as hard as it is to keep control of, is a powerful force that can totally destroy you. The one thing I try to focus on is to always be building other people up. Support them and encourage them, don’t tear them down because you’re mad they’re doing better. Your throne isn’t worth very much if it’s built from all the people you stepped on to get there.
So yeah, you’re totally becoming an adult. And sure, it’s probably the most terrifying thing that’s ever happened to you because you’re way too big to be riding the mechanical pony at HyVee, and even though you sometimes still eat at Fritz’s, it’s not really the same train experience my nephew gets now. But remember that that being an adult and finding who you are is fluid and subject to change. Be nice to people, breathe, it’s going to be alright.
Maybe growing up isn’t such a bad thing after all. (But if you’re still panicking... second to the right, and straight on ‘till morning).
xxx,
Gabs
