While every family's dynamics are different, every single mother strives for the same goal – to make life better for her children. In other home settings, there is a father figure to look up to as strong and protective and a mother figure to appreciate for her love and compassion. In my family and many others, a single mother had to play both roles. These mothers serve as students and teachers, learning how to live one day at a time with someone being totally dependent on them. These women have lessons to offer that not everyone is privileged to learn as a child, so here are a few that I learned from my single mother.
1. How to run a household.
This could be everything from doing laundry to paying bills. Home improvements of the best kind are taught here: Lying somewhere between Dad's duct tape and Grandpa's nail and hammer, something magical was created when the single mother added her Gorilla Glue to the equation. Her advice included walking around the house before you leave to ensure that every television is off and that no curling iron is burning a hole into the desk before you leave for work to keep the electric bill low. It may sound a little strange, but I now heat my home by putting my oven on 500 degrees and leaving it open (only try this when AT HOME.)
2. There’s always a way.
Having another partner is always beneficial – not only financially, but sometimes physically. Getting a new washer in the basement? Take it one step at a time, dolly in hand, because you don’t always need a man for everything. Working two, sometimes three part-time jobs while going to school full-time to try to get a better job? “I can sleep when I’m dead,” as my mother puts it.
3. Live within your means.
Although coveted, the newest and biggest gadgets aren’t always necessary. Money doesn't grow on trees (it's actually made from cotton!), so use every drop of toothpaste in the tube and a little less water in your shower.
4. Nothing is ever handed to you.
The definition of hustle was made when the single mom appeared. Because the majority of single mothers aren’t single by choice, our moms have to work twice as hard to make the same things happen in their homes that would happen easily in a two-parent home. Every penny has a purpose. The big things are worth more if you have to work for them.
5. Love yourself before others.
Simply this: You should put yourself first. No one (except your mom) is going to love and understand you better than you. There should always be a higher standard for people coming into your life when you view things from the viewpoint of a single-mother household.
She can do it by herself… why can’t you?
