As someone who works in a restaurant as both a hostess and a server, I've noticed some things that some people don't seem to understand when it comes to how restaurants work, so I've compiled a list of things for you to keep in mind next time you decide to dine out.
1. Servers are people, too.
Believe it or not, your server is actually doing the best they can for you. Not everything is their fault, and they should not be punished for everything that may go wrong during your dining experience. That being said, treat your server with kindness and respect, and they will do so in return.
2. Let hosts/hostesses do their job.
Upon entering a restaurant, you may or may not be greeted by a host. If you are, allow them to seat you. If no one is present to greet you, look around. Is there a host stand? Is there a sign directing you to a host or asking that you wait for one to help you? If there is, be patient. Please do not try seat yourself in a restaurant unless you are told to do so. Often there are "sections" in restaurants, each with their own designated server. The host seats servers in turns, so that no one server becomes too busy, and so that you as a customer will receive the best service possible.
3. Open tables do not equate available tables.
Sometimes, it's hard to know when it will be busy on any given day/night in a restaurant, which means that sometimes you will be put on a waiting list before you can be seated and served. Sometimes there aren't enough servers and/or kitchen staff for unexpectedly busy days, so please, be patient with us. We are not trying to upset you.
4. You have been seated in a certain place for a reason.
I have already said it's a no-no to try to seat yourself, but it's also a no-no to try to switch tables after being seated without asking. To add to that, ask your server/host if you'd like to pull up any chairs or an extra table for a growing party. It may seem harmless to just grab an empty table, but you are taking up another table, and therefore limiting the amount of tips your server will receive. However, if you happen to pull up a table from another server's section, you could be limiting another server's tips.
5. Servers depend on the tips they make.
I know this sounds dramatic, but for a lot of servers, this is true. Serving is, if not one of many jobs one person could be working, how many servers make their money to pay for bills and absolute necessities. I'm not sure about other establishments, but the following is not true for the restaurant I work at: if you're a server that has a slow night, the restaurant does not make up for the tips you did not make to get you to minimum wage. So, if you made $5 in tips for a whole shift, you get that $5 plus the $2-ish (server wage where I live in MS) per hour that you worked. Servers do more for you than you realize and definitely deserve tips.
Basically, be kind and tip your wait staff.
Also, I think it's only fair that I provide a disclaimer: this list is not true for every restaurant and is based on my and my co-workers' personal experiences.
