5 Reasons You Need To Call Your Grandma

5 Reasons You Need To Call Your Grandma

If you even need a list, which you shouldn't, just call her.

My grandma and I talk on the phone every week, usually for a little over an hour on Sunday afternoons. I try to make a list before we chat, of things I've done that week which I can tell her about to show that I'm being social and active, but the list is scrapped after the first ten minutes of conversation and we're chatting along like we have all the time in the world. If you need a little inspiration to call your grandmother, look no further than this list.

1. She cares about what you're doing

If anyone is going to listen (or at least pretend to listen) about your classroom mix up, it's her. You're her grandbaby and even if your troubles are silly or small, she's at least going to hold the phone to her ear and hum back every once in a while. Maybe she doesn't actually care, if you have a grandma who's not as great as mine, but I'm pretty sure it's in the grandma contract that they have to pretend anyways.

2. She'll make time to listen

Grandmas are usually retired, but even without a job my grandma is sometimes busier than I am. Which makes sense, because all of her friends are retired and my grandma is a super fun person to hang out with, why wouldn't she be busy? If she's busy the first time you call, call again later. I know very few people in the world who will make time for me the way that my grandmother will.

3. Great advice

Because she's been where you've been and even if she hasn't been, she's still smarter than you. More experience means more knowledge and she's probably willing to share some of that knowledge with you if you reach out and call her. Even if the advice she gives isn't what you want to do or what you're going to do, second opinions are always helpful. Sometimes you need to look at a problem from another vantage point to solve it, which is exactly what a grandma can do.

4. Reciprocity

My grandma sends me letters about once every two weeks and although the phone call to letter exchange isn't exactly a trade, it's an unspoken agreement at this point. After opening emails and texts all day it's nice to have something in your hands a person sat down and took the time to hand write for you. Letters are underrated. I know very few things more exciting than fighting with your mailbox and actually coming away with mail for yourself and not just your roommates.

5. Because you can

We all love to act like time doesn't affect us or the people we love, but we are not impervious to the aching and wearing that the clock gives us all. Someday it's not going to be as easy as picking up the phone to get in touch with the one you love, so do it now while you can.

Are you still reading this? Go call your grandma.

Cover Image Credit: my photo

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I Understand

The pain I've carried was not of my making.

I Understand

You have blocked out the cause,

and justified the effect.

I have carried this pain for my entire existence.

You’ve been allowed your delusion for longer,

I understand.

I see what you aren’t strong enough to face.

I see the whole story.

I understand.

I see what the truth has done.

I see the carnage wrought on the innocents.

I understand.

Unfortunately, the shattered pieces of my life,

won’t be enough to keep your world from shattering.

I know you are soon to face the day of reckoning.

I wish I could make it easier for you.

I wish I could stop your pain.

The pain I’ve carried was not of my making,

and it all but destroyed me.

I was innocent, I understand.

I am grateful to you though,

for what will shatter your world,

will finally free me from the pain in mine.

I understand maybe, just maybe,

Someday you will too.

Cover Image Credit: Photo by: Anja Osenberg

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I Came Upon A List That Ended Up Being Mimi's Legacy When She Was Gone

Even though she’s not with us anymore, she will always be in our hearts.

While my family and I are grieving and our beloved family being in hospice, we have ended up going through drawers of endless pictures. There were pictures of me and my cousins at my aunt’s wedding, and polaroids of my great-grandparents, and grandparents I’ve never seen before.

While opening a new drawer, I found a piece of paper in my Mimi’s handwriting. I opened it and read on the top, “5 Steps for Demolishing Depression” written by Randall McQuin. I sighed and knew God has funny ways of showing us what we need to hear, and well, this was one of them.

1. Spend 5 minutes but no longer in thinking about what is wrong

2. Do something both affirmative and physical. i.e. jogging, a brisk walk, scrubbing a floor, cleaning out desk drawer—anything that occupies the mind to some degree.

3. Pray about it. Some people make this a first step, but it cannot be effectively employed until you have reflected on your feelings and had some positive physical activity

4. Indulge yourself—eat one tasty sweet.

5. Do something for another person—a telephone call to a lonely friend, a thoughtful card or a note, a thermos of chicken soup personally delivered: It is vital to take these 5 steps in proper order and to complete each of them. If depression has not left at the end of the process repeat it. Most people will find that it is effective within 24 hours.

I’ve never seen this list before and my Mimi has never read it out loud to me either. It was a sign from her, and a sign from God.

My Mimi would never want us to sit around and be a sad puddle about her. She would want us to go on the planned vacations, she would want us to go to that concert we’ve had tickets to forever. She wouldn’t want us to stop everything and be sad. She would want us to live.

My Mimi was a busy bee. From Girl Scouts to Bone Builders, to be a deacon in our family church. She was always doing something. I tend to see myself keeping busy when I don’t want to sit around and pout. From what I have learned, it has helped.

Praying is one of the ones that really stood out to me. With Mimi being so active in the church, she is someone I would go to for spiritual advice, or if I had a question about the bible. I’ve turned away from God for some time, and lately, I’ve found myself praying more and more each day. I hope when Mimi is joined with God I don’t turn my back. I hope I pray instead of becoming astray again.

Number 4 is a hard one because we always baked sweets in our house. We would grab the family cookbook and bake old recipes that our mom’s mom made, and our great-greats made. We would always bake enough sweets for each household in town and leave enough for Mimi and Boppa because we knew they would love them the most, and the memory that is with each recipe.

Lastly, paying it forward. My Mimi wanted people to pay it forward in memorial of her. Mimi was someone who was a part of Faith in Action and helped with Everybody Eats. She was always paying it forward and never would complain.

Finding this list brought comfort to my heart and tears to my eyes. Even though she’s not with us anymore, she will always be in our hearts. This is just part of her legacy.

Cover Image Credit: Callaghan Carter

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