I don't know about you, but I've heard friends justify breakup-worthy acts by partners because of emotional connections getting in the way. And that makes sense; you want to give leeway to the people you love, and the question of whether the hurt you feel in the relationship is actually worse than the hurt that a breakup would bring is a terrifying one. But relationships need more than just love to survive. If love is truly the only thing you share with another person, you often just hurt yourself in the long run, as your relationship continues to bring you difficulties and you limit yourself to the opportunity to go out and meet someone who does give you the relationship you deserve. Even worse, you can limit your ability to go out and meet yourself and fall in love with the person you are independently. Obviously every relationship is case-by-case, but here are five needs a serious relationship should be meeting.

1. Love

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Okay yes, I'll start here because you do need love. Without care and compassion for and from your partner, you cannot cooperate effectively, and if you don't love the person you're with, or at least are on the way to loving them, then the relationship may need redefining. However, it is important to make sure you love them and the person they are, not just love the idea of them, or of a relationship, or the stability of consistency, or loving them physically. If this is really a serious relationship, a lack of genuine love towards one another can only cause hurt.

2. Trust

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This is a big one. You can love someone, but without a foundation of trust, there are too many limitations. Now, I completely understand how people make mistakes, and sometimes trust can be lost. But when trust is threatened in one regard, there still has to be a trust that the person will make it up to you, or fix their mistakes, and trust that they won't do it again. If your relationship exists in a constant state of worry with no hope of bettering that, then it will only inevitably cause you and your partner pain. You don't need to trust them unconditionally all the time if that's unrealistic for your position, but if there's a complete lack of trust, then there's not enough of a foundation to truly build a relationship on.

3. Joy

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Your relationship and your person should make you happy, and if they don't, then what do you need to change to get there? Obviously, no one is going to make you happy all of the time, but the net growth of the relationship should always be positive. If someone makes you sad more than they make you happy, then your relationship isn't a positive in your life. We should all love ourselves enough to leave situations that we can when they are hurting us, and if your relationship doesn't have joy, then go find one that does.

4. Communication

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My BIGGEST pet peeve in TV shows and movies is when serious issues could easily be solved with just simple communication. For example, I loved "Bridgerton", but I just wanted to put Daphne and Simon in a locked room until they simply talked things out. So many things can be lost or misunderstood and cause unnecessary hurt when communication isn't a priority in a relationship. Make sure you and your partner have an effective way of making one another feel heard and prioritized. This especially applies to issues that may arise in the relationship. Without an effective means of communicating those problems, they can never be fixed. Please, please, please communicate in a way that works for both of you.

5. Growth

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This is both personal and together. As a team, you should grow and change as time goes on and as needs are discovered within the relationship. Even more importantly, your partner should help to bring out the best in you, and the best relationships allow for both partners to grow and better themselves with the support of the other person. You can love someone, but if they bring out the worst in you, or stunt your growth as a person, then it might not be the best idea to be with them.

I hope this helped affirm your current relationship or gave a general guideline for when you do enter a healthy relationship. Love being in love!