Admit it. Over the next two months, you'll be at the movie theater a lot. With movies such as "Deadpool" (out now), "Batman v. Superman, Dawn of Justice" (out now), "Allegiant" (out now), "Captain America, Civil War" (released May 6th), "X-Men", "Apocalypse" (released May 27th), and such, we'll all be visiting our local theaters and spending a shameful amount of money to get our taste of these epic films.

Admit this too. You have one looming fear. You've been stoked for months, probably annoying your friends with how much you talk about nothing but this upcoming movie. Yet you harbor this reasonable fear of walking into the theater to receive your life force, sitting down, and being graced with the silhouette of a very tall moviegoer sitting right before you and, with cookie-cutter perfection, blocking your view of the screen. The entire movie would be spent straining your neck and trying to nonchalantly shift into a kneeling position so maybe, just maybe, you can see over this frustratingly tall and insensitive being. Feel distraught yet? Well, fear no longer. I have compiled five hacks on how to get out of this unfortunate situation. Movie buffs, you may now enter your theaters and satisfy your cravings with ease of mind.

1. The Seat-is-Taken Method

This is the simple, straightforward method. As soon as you claim your seat of choice, your first job is to make the chair in front of you look to be "in use" with a coat or a sweater, to keep any malevolent moviegoer from sitting in your way.
Warning: this method is the easiest to botch up. Half the time, you will be asked if the seat in front of you is taken, and it can be a buzzkill if you have to lie right to their towering face.

2. The Loud, Obnoxious Talker Method

The minute said tall person claims their seat right in your view, adopt the role of that deeply frowned upon an individual who just won't shut up. You know that long wait that occurs before the theater gets dark? Use that time to employ the help of your friends, and if things go smoothly, said tall person shall realize sitting in front of a chatterbox like you could very easily ruin their time here, and they'll move to a new seat.
Warning: this method could give way to the desired effect, or it could result in being told to... well, shut it.

3. The Spoiler Method

There are those movie buffs who go to the theater with their ears practically plugged for fear of hearing any spoilers. A clever method is to play on that fear and with timed precision, strike up a conversation with your friends about the movie's ending. Even if you know nothing about it, with a preceding "wait, spoiler alert but.." you can easily chase away said, tall person.
Warning: you raise the possibility of starting a conversation that consists of actual spoilers being tossed around the theater. This method may work depending on whether or not you are willing to risk that.

4. The Deathly-Ill Method

Out of all the methods I've compiled, this one is by far the most reliable. Just pretend to be sick. Not the I've-got-a-cold kind of sick. No, the kind of sick that means sneezing and coughing with all the gunk and mucus your body can produce, the kind of sick that means dry heaves and obnoxious nose-blowing. If that doesn't get that tall human being out from in front of you, not much else will.
WARNING: I hope you like extra elbow room, cause this method will ensure that anyone within a fifteen-foot radius will gravitate a good distance away from you.

5. The Warm Water Bottle Method

How devious are you willing to get? This method requires a bit of preparation before you get to the theater. I'm sure we've all smuggled a couple of snacks into a movie. We know how expensive anything at that cursed concession stand is. That being said, all you need for this method is a small bottle of water and some kind of thick outer layer under which you can hide said bottle. It's important to have it on your person so that your body heat can warm the water. It must also be well-hidden so that it won't be taken from you before you enter the theater. Once you have claimed your seat, your bottle of water should at least be at room temperature. Nonchalantly unscrew the bottle and trickle the warm water onto the chair in front of you. For the next couple of hours, this seat is officially off-limits. Sitting on water in the middle of a dark theater is unpleasant enough. Warm water? This can be easily mistaken for human pee. No one will be blocking your view today
Warning: there's a risk of you being spotted performing your devious deed. Stealth is key.

To all you moviegoers out there, no longer must you fear this unfortunate circumstance. I know it seems imminent, that it only happens to you and only you, but fear not. You have now been equipped with effective counter-moves that will guarantee a satisfactory time at the theater.