I was 12 when I heard the first song. It took me two days to memorize every song on the album and only weeks till I was purchasing concert tickets. I didn't know it then, but that was the start to my "fan girl" life. As I grew up, my peers started going to parties on Friday nights to get wasted, while I was on a train going to a concert. While my peers were stuck in school on a Wednesday, I was waiting outside of buildings in New York City.
Every fan girl has heard the same old questions. "You like who?" "Why do you spend so much money to see them?" "I hope you know ____ sucks!" "They're terrible live."
Fan girls have often been described as crazy, obsessive, insane teenage girls who follow a band or artist around. Now, while I can't totally protest that statement, I know first hand that being a fan girl is much more than being "obsessed" with a band.
It doesn't matter who you've been a fan of, being a fan girl is more than just seeing your favorite artist live. It's feeling accepted in a group of people much like yourself. It's having experiences and memories unlike any that your peers have had.
Although my fan girl life has since been retired (R.I.P. Jonas Brothers) I think every fan girl, no matter what artist they love, can relate.
Here are five life lessons I've learned from living the fan girl life:
Live in the moment
The experiences I witnessed as a fan have taught me how crucial it is to live in the moment because many of those experiences are unlike anything I've ever thought could happen. From sleeping on city streets, getting into exclusive events and meeting my favorite band, to going to endless concerts, whether it be from the front row or last, it's all taught me to live in the now. Every moment I witnessed was unique and could never be replicated. Every memory is special in their own way, attached with their own anecdotes of the crazy events that happened that day. Looking back, I wish I would've lived in those moments a little extra, put my phone down and just take it in, because I could've appreciated them so much more.
When I was surrounded by ten thousand other screaming, anxious fans like myself, in front of the people who have given us music and memories that defined who we have become, nothing else mattered.
Money doesn't grow on trees
As I stare down the narrow path of college graduation in less than a month, I've realized how important money is. I also realize the amount of money I spent on my favorite artists could pay of at least a quarter of the college debt I'm about to have...
From concerts and VIP packages, to gas and train tickets, merchandise and memorabilia, just thinking about it makes me a little nauseous.
Looking back, it was worth every single penny, though.
Be nice to people
Every fan girl can admit to almost getting into a fight, or two or five. I mean what do do you expect when your standing in a crowd of screaming girls behind a barricade, all trying to push their way to the front? And It's always fab when security tells you to "not scream" and said artists will come and meet everyone, but there always has to be that one obnoxious girl who can't listen. It can be extremely hard to be nice, but over the years, I've learned how important it is.
Through being a fan, I have met so many people like myself, by being nice and just talking to people.
Not only does being nice and friendly make it easier to make friends, but it also has some awesome advantages. I can't tell you how many times I've gotten into events or have even been able to stay front row at a concert I wasn't supposed to be just by being nice to a security guard or staff member.
Yes, it's tempting to punch someone in the face in situations we put ourselves in, but the advantages of keeping your cool are far much more worth it.
Don't take advantage of anything, you never know when something will end
Personally growing up a fan of a band that abruptly broke up, it felt like a small piece of me was gone the moment they announced their separation. What was I going to do without the endless trips to see them? The concerts we'd never witness again, the meet and greets that will never be the same, it was all too much to handle.
I without a doubt took advantage of the years I had with my favorite band. I naively thought it was going to last forever, that a band of brothers was going to stay together, touring while they're in their 40's with wives and kids. When it all ended, it shook me, but it taught me the biggest lesson.
In life, we never know when things are going to end. It could be years from now, or right around the corner but the bottom line is we never know. It is so crucial to not take advantage of the time we have, doing anything we love.
The empty feeling we have when something ends will feel a lot less void if we don't take advantage of it and appreciate it while it's still here.
Life experiences are far more important than 8th-period math class.
Just last week I had a conversation with my mom, that conversation is what sparked this entire article. After thinking about the eight plus years I spent living the "fan girl" life, I realized how much my parents played a role in it. From the ages of 12-20, my parents let me get away with much more than most of my peers. Letting me skip school, take a train on my own with my friends, sleep in NYC, go to concerts on my own and all on top of it, give me money for it all. The endless amounts of concert tickets, money for train rides, food, you name it, they'd always give it to me and let me go.
I sat with my mom, first thanking her, but then asking her why.
"I've realized in life that the experiences you have matter far much more. You did good in school, you were a good kid and having these memories that will stay with you for the rest of your life will mean much more than that day of school you missed."
That is when it hit me. Living the life I did for my teenage years has absolutely made me into the person I am today. I remember each and every experience like it was yesterday. I remember the feeling I got in my heart on my way to see them. I remember the excitement in my chest when the lights went black right before they hit the stage. I remember the tears that fell as they sang their last songs. I remember it all and I couldn't be more thankful that I was able to have those unique experiences that I will remember for the rest of my life.
When you become a fan girl, they don't tell you about the dreaded stress of concert ticket sales, the arguments you'll get into waiting on countless lines or the frustration you'll feel when you've been on your feet all day long and still didn't get in to see them. They won't tell you about the struggles you faced trying to get a reply on twitter for them to notice you, or the feeling you'll have when you have to miss out on an experience.
But, they also won't tell you that these experiences, the good and the bad, will define some of the most crucial years of your life. You'll learn patience, gratitude, dedication and how to be sneaky and smart (it comes in handy, believe me). They won't tell you that the $300 floor seat you just bought is indeed worth it or that the nights you waited up for their album to hit iTunes was worth the exhaustion you felt in school the next day.
They won't tell you that a band or artist will become more than that. They'll become the people who get you through your best and worst times, the people you run to when you don't know where to go next. Their music is what help you through the toughest of times and being in their presence is what brought you the immense kind of joy you didn't think was possible.
If at 12-years-old you would have told me the crazy experiences I've had, from hopping barricades in the middle of the Big Apple, sneaking into meet my favorite band, being on stage with them during their concert, and meeting people I'm still friends with today, to name a few, would all be true, I'd never believe you.
It wasn't until the lights faded and the fog dissipated away that I realized how much I had grown as a person. Being a "fan girl" wasn't just a phase. It was a lifestyle that, without me realizing it then, made me into who I am today and who I will be for years to come.
