I always dread the inevitable "What's your major?" question. Going to a technical school, where at least half my friends are majoring in some-type-of-complicated-engineering with a minor in something-I've-never-even-heard-of, I get a wide array of responses when I utter those fateful words: "I'm an English major." Often, people's eyes widen with a look of horror as they think to themselves, "This girl is never going to get a job!" They smugly ask me what I plan on doing with my degree, like they've already decided I am beneath them. Don't get me wrong, I do not in any way claim that being an English major is even close to as hard as majoring in biology or engineering, because you could not pay me enough to do some complicated differential equations problem set. Yet, you probably couldn't pay an aerospace engineering major to write a 15-page research paper using eight scholarly sources in MLA format. Between the unsettling eye rolls or gasps when I tell people my major, here are some things that my fellow literature majors and I are tired of hearing:
1. "What can you even do with that degree?"
Let me first start with saying that are probably 500 billion more polite ways to ask that question. Second, there are probably 500 billion different career paths you can take with an English degree. People who major in English often go on to be lawyers, teachers, work in public administrations, communications and business. Not to mention, an English degree teaches you how to express yourself in an appealing way and think critically. Not to be cocky, but I'm probably a hell of a lot more eloquent than an Engineer.
2. "So you're going to be a teacher?"
I'm not hating on teachers, my mom is a teacher (shout out Mom), but no, that is not what I am going to do. I am on the pre-law track. I plan to use my "inadequate" degree to become a criminal defense lawyer or an attorney who works for the Innocence Project (look it up, it's pretty cool shit).
3. "Oh, so you have like no homework right?"
No, you're wrong again. I have to read more pages of a book in one night than you've ever dreamed of. I'll have five research papers all over 10 pages due in one week. Do I have as many exams as you? Probably not. That's because my grades come from intense scrutiny over my proper use of the Oxford comma and MLA format. Doesn't sound like no homework to me.
4. "You're probably not going to make that much money."
This one really irks my soul. Not only is this completely untrue, but if you base your major and career choice off of the amount of money you will make, I really feel sorry for you. I love my major. I love to write and read and have in depth discussions about things other people don't care about. I feel fulfilled by what I study in school. I could have all the money in the world, but if I don't feel fulfilled by my career choice, I will be miserable.
5. "That's not a real major."
I'm not even going to explain myself on this one. I don't shit talk your major, so don't shit talk mine. Easy as that.
