If you read my article, "What Every Bisexual Person Wants The World To Know," you know there are a lot of misconceptions about being bisexual. This article is a bit of a follow-up, and also sort of a praise to Suzanne Samin’s excellent Bustle article, "Are You Sure You Aren't a Lesbian? 11 Ignorant Things Bi Girls Are Tired of Hearing." I suggest everyone goes and reads it, as it points out many of the ignorant things all bi persons are extremely tired of hearing. Here are some expansions on the most important ones.
1. Whether or not bi people become straight or gay when they are in a relationship or get married.
If two people are married, that means they are committed to each other in whatever way they so mutually decide. This does not mean a person flops their sexual identity around like a fish just so you can sleep at night. When I look at a couple, I do not assume their preferences, I just assume that they love each other and that itself is beautiful, and I hope everyone finds their special person in life regardless of their preference or identity.
2. Anything about threesomes.
Just a flat out 'no' at this point. The number of people who over-sexualize the bi identity is degrading. Not everyone is comfortable to have more than one person in the bedroom, and assuming that I’m down to let you live out your bedroom fantasy is degrading.
3. Being sick of a gender after a breakup.
There is nothing funny about people making jokes of our previous relationships and thinking that someone has turned us either gay or straight because of their actions. I’d also like to point out that no one can make us change our minds, no matter how appealing or repulsive their actions may be.
4. So, how does it work?
This one probably goes for most sexualities that are deemed “out of the norm.” This is a very personal and private conversation to have with anyone, and this sort of sensitivity calls for a pretty good relationship with someone in order to “explain” any bedroom activities to an outsider. Always try to be respectful and open-minded.
If you do have a question, maybe ask someone you know is OK with you asking stupid questions or even search it on the internet. The internet will never judge you, but a complete stranger will probably be upset with you!
