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36 Pick-Up Lines Guaranteed Not To Get The Girl

If you were a fruit, you'd be a fine-apple.

Kimberly Burton

Jan 23, 2017

National Writers Society

1250

36 Pick-Up Lines Guaranteed Not To Get The Girl

Keller Law Offices

Here's advice on how to not be labeled "that guy:" don't use any of these. Ever.

1. If you were a fruit, you'd be a fine-apple.

2. Tonight this Han doesn’t want to fly Solo.

3. I'm not sure what quidditch position you play, but I bet you're a keeper.

4. You are hotter than the bottom of my laptop.

5. From one to America, how free are you tonight?

6. It's handy that I have my library card because I'm totally checking you out.

7. Did you invent the airplane? Cause you seem Wright for me.

8. If I had to rate you from 1-10, I would rate you a 9 because I'm the one you're missing.

9. Do you have a map? I'm getting lost in your eyes.

10. If Internet Explorer is brave enough to ask you to be your default browser, I’m brave enough to ask you out!

11. Hey, girl, are you my appendix? Because you give this weird feeling that makes me want to take you out.

12. Do you have a Band-Aid? 'Cause I scraped my knee falling for you.

13. There are people who say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Apparently, none of them have ever been in your arms.

14. Remember me? Oh, that’s right, I’ve met you only in my dreams.

15. If you were a Transformer, you'd be Optimus Fine.

16. Are you religious? Because you're the answer to my prayers.

17. Do you live in a corn field? 'Cause I'm stalking you.

18. Was your mother a beaver? Because damn!

19. Does your left eye hurt? Because you've been looking right all day.

20. Hey, girl. Is your name Wi-Fi? Because we have a connection.

21. My doctor told me I'm missing vitamin U. Can you help me?

22. If you were a vegetable, you'd be a cute-cumber.

23. Is your name Google? Because you're the answer to everything I've been searching for

24. I'm not a photographer but I can picture us together.

25. Are you German? 'Cause I wanna be Ger-man!

26. Excuse me. I think you have something in your eye. Nope; it’s just a sparkle.

27. Charmanders are red, mudkips are blue, is you were a pokemon, I would choose you.

28. Do you work at Starbucks? Because I like you a latte.

29. Hey, tie your shoes! I don’t want you falling for anyone else.

30. Are you a parking ticket? 'Cause you've got fine written all over you.

31. Go on; feel my jacket. It's made of boyfriend material.

32. If you were a chicken, you would be impeccable.

33. What's your favorite silverware? Because I like to spoon.

34. I'm not staring at your boobs. I'm staring at your heart.

35. Was your dad a boxer? Cause you're a knockout!

36. I will stop loving you when an apple grows from a mango tree on the 30th of February.

If you ever tried to use any of these, I'd like to ask if you're a red light... because you need to stop.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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36 Pick-Up Lines Guaranteed Not To Get The Girl

If you were a fruit, you'd be a fine-apple.

1. If you were a fruit, you'd be a fine-apple.

2. Tonight this Han doesn’t want to fly Solo.

3. I'm not sure what quidditch position you play, but I bet you're a keeper.

4. You are hotter than the bottom of my laptop.

5. From one to America, how free are you tonight?

6. It's handy that I have my library card because I'm totally checking you out.

7. Did you invent the airplane? Cause you seem Wright for me.

8. If I had to rate you from 1-10, I would rate you a 9 because I'm the one you're missing.

9. Do you have a map? I'm getting lost in your eyes.

10. If Internet Explorer is brave enough to ask you to be your default browser, I’m brave enough to ask you out!

11. Hey, girl, are you my appendix? Because you give this weird feeling that makes me want to take you out.

12. Do you have a Band-Aid? 'Cause I scraped my knee falling for you.

13. There are people who say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Apparently, none of them have ever been in your arms.

14. Remember me? Oh, that’s right, I’ve met you only in my dreams.

15. If you were a Transformer, you'd be Optimus Fine.

16. Are you religious? Because you're the answer to my prayers.

17. Do you live in a corn field? 'Cause I'm stalking you.

18. Was your mother a beaver? Because damn!

19. Does your left eye hurt? Because you've been looking right all day.

20. Hey, girl. Is your name Wi-Fi? Because we have a connection.

21. My doctor told me I'm missing vitamin U. Can you help me?

22. If you were a vegetable, you'd be a cute-cumber.

23. Is your name Google? Because you're the answer to everything I've been searching for

24. I'm not a photographer but I can picture us together.

25. Are you German? 'Cause I wanna be Ger-man!

26. Excuse me. I think you have something in your eye. Nope; it’s just a sparkle.

27. Charmanders are red, mudkips are blue, is you were a pokemon, I would choose you.

28. Do you work at Starbucks? Because I like you a latte.

29. Hey, tie your shoes! I don’t want you falling for anyone else.

30. Are you a parking ticket? 'Cause you've got fine written all over you.

31. Go on; feel my jacket. It's made of boyfriend material.

32. If you were a chicken, you would be impeccable.

33. What's your favorite silverware? Because I like to spoon.

34. I'm not staring at your boobs. I'm staring at your heart.

35. Was your dad a boxer? Cause you're a knockout!

36. I will stop loving you when an apple grows from a mango tree on the 30th of February.

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There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

13. To be well-rounded.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

16. To be prepared for anything.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

18. How to be creative.

19. To brush off gossip.

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

Email the professor

Attend the first class

Keep attending class

Have a backup plan

Remember that everything works out at the end

It's mandatory to have these conversations.

1. What do you do for a living?

2. What's your favorite color?

3. Do you have any siblings?

4. What's your favorite television show?

5. When is your birthday?

6. What's your biggest goal in life?

7. If you had three wishes granted to you by a genie, what would they be?

8. What's your favorite childhood memory?

9. If you could change one thing about your life, what would it be?

10. Are you a cat or a dog person?

11. Do you believe in a religion or any sort of spiritual power?

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