1. The extensive use of the word "wicked."
And no, we're not saying things are "evil" or "bad". Essentially, it's exactly the opposite. Such is the Massachusetts way.
2. An uncanny ability to pronounce the names of towns and cities that most others falter (or hilariously fail) at figuring out.
I promise Worcester is not "Wuh-stehr-sure". However, in case you weren't confused enough already, we do in fact pronounce every letter in "Dorchester".
3. We insist that it's a rotary.
Not a roundabout. And please, put your blasphemous directions to "take the third exit in the traffic circle" away.
SEE ALSO: I Live In Boston And Hate The Patriots
4. On the topic of driving, we generally aren't the kindest or most patient behind the wheel.
The nickname "Masshole" exists for a reason.
5. And if you're in the car with one of us, you might get to experience this fun thing called "banging a U-ey".
Just an FYI, this isn't a euphemism.
6. We know we've got the best schools in the country.
And we're pretty proud of it, too.
7. Once you cross through Worcester, Aladdin might as well be singing to you.
Here we've got Western Massachusetts, and here we've got Eastern Massachusetts. Depending on where you live, the other side is a whole new world.
8. We're painfully aware that while the T might be great for people watching, it's a complete and total disaster when it comes to actually serving its purpose: getting you where you need to go.
And yes, it's confusing. We know.
9. You'll probably get an eyeroll when you tell us to "pahk the cah in Hahvahd Yahd."
There are actually only two occasions when you can park there. But in general, don't try to park your car in a grassy tourist area, or insist that we all say this on a routine basis.
10. Dunkin' Donuts is the holy grail of coffee. Period.
We run on it, and really, America should too.
11. Speaking of which, you might overhear us ordering a "regular coffee."
There'll be cream and sugar in it. Try it.
12. To us, there's no point in calling it a snowstorm unless there's at least a foot of it on the ground.
Anything less, and we just shrug and sigh, "That's winter."
13. "Faneuil" isn't a funny sounding sneeze.
It's a pretty cool marketplace that gets at least as many tourists as the entrance to Harvard does. Which is a lot.
14. "The Cape" does not refer to part of the uniform of the best superhero.
But it does refer to some of the best beaches to be found.
15. We might get a little miffed when you reduce the legendary "Zoomass Slamherst" to "just a party school."
Yeah, we've got great parties there. And great food. And great scenery. And great education.
16. Clam chowder is creamy.
None of this "clear broth" nonsense. And please, don't put tomatoes in it. That's practically sacrilegious.
17. You'll find that we're pretty used to seeing turkeys everywhere.
And if you're from the Cambridge area, you might have heard of Tina. In fact, you might have heard of Tina even if you're not from around there.
18. When we were little, we probably learned about how Johnny Appleseed was a pretty cool guy.
Even though "John Chapman" isn't nearly as catchy.
19. If you ask us who our favorite person who hails from our great state is, we might have trouble choosing just one.
Matt Damon? Benjamin Franklin? John Cena? JFK? Henry David Thoreau? Leonard Nimoy? Louis C.K.? Abigail Adams? Norman Rockwell? We can go all day.
20. The knowledge that not everyone from the Bay State is from Boston.
Even though it's a pretty darn cool place.
21. There might be a couple funny looks thrown your way if you hand us a traditional bowling ball.
Candlepin? Anyone? Anyone?
22. We'll enthusiastically tell you that the pizza in the North End is the bomb dot com.
I mean, pizza's awesome in general, but have you tried this stuff? Perfection.
23. There's a pretty good chance that we've climbed a mountain.
We do have lots, after all.
24. The third Monday of each April is an important day to us.
It happens to be Patriots' Day, where we commemorate battles that took place in Lexington and Concord.
25. The best color of socks is definitely red.
Boston Red Sox, that is.
26. We have this quirky little habit of referring to a man who wears the number 12 as a "goat."
It's GOAT. Greatest of All Time. A 100% factual acronym for the quarterback of the best football team in the NFL.
27. Let's be honest. We all know the truth here: all Boston sports are the greatest.
And so are the fans.
28. We're well aware that we're spoiled with beautiful fall foliage every year.
In case the zillion pictures we take weren't enough proof.
SEE ALSO: 10 Reasons Why Massachusetts Is The Best Place To Grow Up
29. We either have an unhealthy obsession with cranberries... or we loathe them.
Their population virtually outnumbers ours.
30. If we're familiar with the Boston area, we don't flinch when we see a bus with a cartoon duck on it drive into the water.
It's a Duck Tour. We're normal, I promise. Mostly.
31. There's usually a distinct lack of shivering when exposed to freezing temperatures.
Winter seems to last for eons around here, so we get used to it.
32. Don't say "MCAS." It makes us sad.
How I grew to loathe those little bubbles that used to be so fun to color in.
33. We've probably had a Friendly's sundae or two in our time.
Given that the restaurant originated in Springfield, there's a pretty decent chance.
34. "413," "508," "617," "781," and "978" are some of our favorite numbers.
Ring, ring. It's Google calling to tell you to search this if you don't know what I mean.
35. And most of all, we're incredibly proud to be from the best damn state there is.
Don't try to argue that with us. We're also pretty good at arguing.
