After four years of being on this campus, I was bound to have questions. You don't have to answer, just think about them.

Consider these a parting gift:

1. Why do none of the TVs in the Loyola gym work? They're all attached to cardio machines that work...but they don't.

2. Is your housing time ACTUALLY random?

3. Did you actually screen roommates to match them up? Because mine was substance free freshman year and I wasn't...

4. Where are all the avocados on this damn campus?

5. Why can't sushi always be a swipe?

6. Why don't we have underground tunnels (or do we...)?

7. Does HC not know the meaning of "snow day"?

8. Are the stairs specially designed to injure you in the winter?

9. Why isn't the counseling center more promoted?

10. How many smart cars do we actually need?

11. How come extracurricular vans are in need of some serious TLC?

12. Why do you hate people that live off campus?

13. Why don't you send off campus non-college tenants a nice basket to apologize for their poor choice of location?

14. Why can't I take food out of Kimball?

15. Can I be hired full time as a Campion baker?

16. Can you give me a nice schematic breakdown of the meal plan?

17. Can you give me a general idea of how many credits I'm taking? I'm tired of being asked.

18. Why can't I get a guided tour of Ciampi?

19. Are the freshman and sophomore codes actually up to code?

20. Speaking of easy street dorms, why don't any of the showers have good water pressure? (except Hanselman)

21. Can we consider having a community vacuum in the dorms?

22. Can we work on the heating issue in Dinand?

23. Or the wifi. Dear god the wifi.

24. Why are the Science Cafe women often unhappy?

25. Why is CB2 incomparably better than Cool Beans?

26. When will the track team get an indoor track?

27. Why are all the school vans parked in the student lot?

28. Can it be less difficult to find a class that covers your cross-cultural requirement?

29. Where do you get all your decorative cabbages?

30 Why can't we have a grad school?

Because I never wanna leave. ❤️