Teenagers and college kids often get to experience the most interesting jobs. But no job comes with as many unique stories as those with kids. Here are 28 signs you have been a summer camp counselor.
1. You get the best nicknames.
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“Big Mac" has a nice ring to it. It says “I have authority but they still think I'm cool." I like it.
2. You find yourself saying things that you never thought you'd say.
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Including, but not limited to, "PUT DOWN THAT TREE!"
3. There are kids you have taken under your wing...
4. And others you'd like to have under your fist.
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5. You get so excited when you see that last kid's parent pull up.
6. But then sigh when you realize you still have to clean up all the crap they left behind.
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7. You know that kids will cry for the dumbest reasons.
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God forbid you don't have money for the snow cone truck.
8. Your most used phrase becomes "Yeah well life isn't fair."
9. You get a really sexy farmer's tan by end of summer.
10. But you know you have the best job, because you get to wear a T-shirt and athletic shorts every day.
11. You are thankful for crafts that occupy kids for a while...
12. Except for the ones that require paint.
Nope, not gonna happen.
13. You come to respect a child's creativity, especially when trying to get his/her way out of getting in trouble
"Natalie, pick up the trash"
*goes over and picks up brother*
14. You have learned to explain things in the clearest way possible, because kids have really shitty inference skills.
A kid –– let's call him Billy –– loved to hit our poor plastic wiffleball bat against walls and the ground. It's no surprise that our bat suddenly got this giant dent in it. One day we took our kids to play with another park. Billy picked up their bat and started whacking it off a tetherball pole. I said “Billy! Why do you think our bat is broken!". He looked at me very confused and goes, “We don't have a pole?"
15. You know that a child's rationale can be described as a lack thereof.
*First day of camp*
“What's your name"
“Jill"
"Oh, my mom's name is Jill... Can I call you mom?"
“No."
16. Every camp has a most loathed kid.
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And the other kids could tell you exactly who it is.
17. You can get a kid to do just about anything with a food bribe.
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“First one to clean up every stick in the area gets this half-eaten bag of chips!"
18. Speaking of sticks, you wonder why kids love to play with the dumbest things.
Yes, our kids loved sticks. And that is where “put down that tree" gets into the story. And also why we had so many stick fragments that we had to bribe kids to clean it up. There was also some fascination with animal poop that I will never understand.
19. “It's five o'clock somewhere" doesn't seem like such a dumb phrase.
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Because 1) you find yourself doing other weirdly timed things, like having a luau on a Wednesday. And 2) you absolutely need a drink after camp (the fact that my camp was over at 1 is not important)
20. Pinterest has become your best friend.
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21. You have seen kids get injured under the strangest circumstances.
Seven stitches from getting hit by a cell phone? Why not.
22. You feel guilty getting paid to play in bouncy houses and make sarcastic remarks to kids
23. You feel so honored when kids ask you to babysit them
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24. You are amazed at your own self-control when it comes to swearing.
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25. You constantly think "If my kid ever acts like that I'm gonna punch them in the face."
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Dear parents, you do not need to leave work to bring your kid snow cone money. They will survive this hardship.
26. The kids make you feel really old.
27. You have stories that people wouldn't even believe.
Yes, that is rain.
28. As much as those kids drive you crazy, you're sad to see camp end. You've gotten to know some hilarious, fantastic kids, and you wouldn't trade those memories for anything.
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Being a camp counselor takes a special type of person –– and by that I mean someone who is arguably insane to put up with little kids all day. Even if you're having the worst day, you can always count on one of those little weasels to make you laugh. The free field trips are great. The pay is nice. Yet none of that matters, because you get to be a role model to some pretty awesome kids.
Got any funny camp counselor stories? Share them in the comments!
