Recently turning 21 made me reflect back on my life, thus far. It made me think about the good, mostly the bad, and the moments in between. It made me realize that I have been so blessed with twenty something years of life so far, which also made me feel old! But I have so much life ahead of me and I am just getting started! The lessons along the way are what have made me who I am today. Though most of the lessons were learned the hard way, I do not regret anything nor would I take anything back. I've learned a lot and am still learning, but here are 21 lessons I've learned by 21. .
1. Don't take life so seriously.
It's easy to get caught up by being a responsible young adult and having a, "good head on your shoulders," but don't let that ruin the fun. You can't be serious 100 percent of time. You will be burnt out too soon. So relax and breathe and remember you are only young once!
2. Your parents are seriously your best friends.
By 21, most people realize this concept because it's the truth. There is nobody looking out for you more out than your parents. Friends will disappoint you and boys will hurt you, but your parents will be right there backing you up. They love you and care for you more than anyone else. It's a shame it took 21 years to realize this!
3. Allow people to walk out of your life.
This is a big one for me. It's OK to lose people. I've seen so many people walk in and out of my life that it has made me question myself. But it's life. People are either a blessing or a lesson. Don't beg anyone to stay. If they don't want to be apart of your life, let them go and move on. Know that this has nothing to do with you. People are always going to disappoint you and the sooner you can learn this, the less devastating it will be when they are no longer apart of your life.
4. Don't worry so much about your future.
The pressures of college, careers, getting a place of your own and marriage are huge today. The stress it can cause young people is unreal. Don't fall into it. Do you and don't feel obligated to be in a rush to do anything. Be motivated, but know that everyone is different and ready for different things at different times. These are all life changing decisions that will affect you long term so choose wisely and take your time.
5. Life is short.
Tomorrow, today even, is not guaranteed. I've watched countless people here one minute and gone the next. Life is short. You think you have years and years ahead of you until you've been personally affected by a young life cut short. It hits home and you begin to rethink all those things you stress about on the daily. Suddenly those things aren't so important and you begin to realize what is. Don't live life like you have tomorrow because you really don't.
6. Make your me time.
It's important. You won't make it without it! Take some time for yourself every now and again. You'll be glad you did and it will keep you sane!
7. Girls are mean.
This is something you think will only be a problem when your in grade school, but I am here to tell you that mean girls have no age limit. There is always going to be that person in life cutting you down and making you feel like the size of an ant. Learn not to let it bother you and it won't. People that act that way only do so because someone else treated them poorly. Break the cycle and always be kind.
8. And guys are stupid.
Who needs them, anyway? Don't let yourself fall into the lie that you need a guy in your life to feel important. Chances are it will only make your life worse not better because most guys suck. Wait it out. You'll know a good guy when you meet one because they are rare today. Don't be the girl that needs a guy, be the girl that a guy needs.
9. Find what you love in life, and run with it.
There is nothing like having something in your life that sets your heart and soul on fire. Everyone is passionate about something. You just need to discover what that is for you and go after it with all that you have.
10. Know a good thing when you have it.
They say good things don't last forever and they don't. And unfortunately you don't know what you got till it's gone. But if you live each day realizing the many blessings you have, instead of always being negative about life, you might not take so many things for granted and enjoy the seasons of life.
11. Love yourself.
This is easier said than done if we're being honest with ourselves. But when you get into your 20s you'll begin to realize why this is important. Self love is tough to learn and most people never do learn it. But once you do you will never compromise your standards again. You will put yourself first and never settle for less than perfect. When relationships fail you wont be completely destroyed over it. You'll be your own advocate. People's opinions of you won't matter so much anymore and you won't let people talk down to you. Above all, you will put yourself first in a healthy way, which is how it should always be.
12. Work hard.
The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary. I live by that line and you should too. Earn it. Put your mind to something and don't settle! You only get one shot at life so be who you want! Don't sit around waiting for good things to come your way. That's not how life works. You want to make something of yourself? Great. Get up and work for it like everybody else. You won't regret it.
13. Set goals and dreams for yourself.
Don't wait. Have a sense of direction of where your life is heading. Know what you want out of life and make a plan on how you are going to get there. This is how you will be the most successful. Don't just exist. Go out and do something life changing, something that matters.
14. Don't get caught up in the drama.
I cannot stress this enough. Drama is for high school and after that, there should be a rule that it is not allowed in any other area of life. Drama is ridiculous but unfortunately it's everywhere and you cannot escape it. You will be 40 years old working the same job you've had for almost twenty years and you will still have drama. Tune it out and do life. Drama will get you nowhere.
15. Make time for the big man upstairs.
Put Him first, and He will put you first. It's really as simple as that. God loves you and cares for you and wants what is best for you so stop shutting Him out and include Him.
16. You don't need to have it all together all of the time.
The people who seem like they have it all together all the time are usually the ones who don't. I'm not sure when society decided that you have to have your life in order 100% of the time but they did. But don't buy into this lie. You are young and you are learning. Make mistakes. Change your mind a couple hundred times. You have to figure life out for yourself and that's a scary thing. You don't need to have it all together right now because one day you will.
17. Welcome wisdom from the elderly.
Seriously, if you ever get the opportunity to sit down with the elderly, do it!! When I first got certified as a nursing assistant, I started out working with old people, and I was honestly terrified. I didn't know how to interact with people who were so old but I quickly realized that they were just like you and me. While some elderly people can be cranky and just downright mean, most are sweethearts and you can learn a thing or two from their long lives and years of wisdom. Take advantage of it! You'll make a couple of new friends and you won't be sorry!
18. Eat the ice cream and the pizza.
I strongly dislike diets because I have quite the sweet tooth. I also am a stress eater and for those that know me, I am always under stress! But girls, you don't really need that thigh gap and your stomach does't need to be as flat as a pancake and perfectly toned. I am all for fitness and a healthy lifestyle. But set boundaries and limits. Your clothing size doesn't matter. Just be healthy and enjoy your favorite foods sometimes.
19. Be selfish.
Invest in yourself. Stop investing your all in your friends, or the boys that you date. Focus on you. People come and go but in the end it's just me, myself and I.
20. Love your life.
Create a life for yourself that you love, and are going to love for the years to come. If you're unhappy with something, change it. One of my favorite lyrics from a song by Lee Brice says "that town, that job, that guy you can leave them behind, girl, you know you're better than that." You are better than that and you can change anything that you don't like. The power is in your hands. So stop feeling sorry for yourself and make a change.
21. You are still learning.
You don't know everything by 21. You wont know everything when your 60 either. Life is a constant learning process. Be humble enough to admit that you don't know it all. When someone wiser offers you advice, take it. Find a mentor who has walked where you are. It will make your life that much easier.
