In light of turning 20 this week, I have been doing some reminiscing. I thought I would share some of the lessons I have been learning and the memories that go with them! So here we go: twenty lessons in twenty years…
1. Time changes everything.
Seriously, everything. I could probably make twenty more sub-points from this point...but don’t worry, I won't. Time gives us a better perspective on things. What was such a burden to me two years ago is barely a thought now. Time allows you to learn from the challenges that you are currently facing until you are ready to face a new one.
2. Be spontaneous… it makes for great memories.
Anyone who know me well know that this idea goes against every part of my being. I like to plan and know what’s coming. However, thanks to some of my friends that are better at spontaneity than I am, I have found the fun and excitement in taking a break from homework for late night drives into Chicago for cupcakes! Because why not?
3. Prioritize and compromise.
I have learned to love these two words. Not because they are any fun. They’re not! However, I have realized that prioritizing, compromising, or a combination of the two, can be the necessary solution to a lot of the problems I run into. Life can be so hectic and you will drive yourself crazy if you do not compromise and balance your priorities.
4. We are all very different and that is okay.
Shout out to my five future roomies! They would agree with me in saying that all six of us have very different personalities: Introverts, extroverts, take-charge, laid-back. We all have different ways of thinking and reacting. This can be a challenge when conflict arises. My first thought is that the problem would be solved if the other person just thought the same way I did. Gosh, am I thankful that that is not the case. My group of friends functions the best when everyone is able to be themselves. We each have different strengths and perspectives to offer.
5. Try new things.
When it came to extracurricular activities I was all over the place. In middle school and high school, I dabbled in basketball, soccer, cross country, track, music, speech, theater, and art. Without those experience, I would not have discovered my love for running, my passion art and design and the fact that I am hopelessly uncoordinated.
6. Be thankful for your community.
The school I attended from third grade through high school was attached to my church, summer camp and youth group. Needless to say, I was very close to the people in my community and involved in a lot of areas. After stepping away during this next phase of life, I can truly appreciate the way my church and school impacted my upbringing. I am thankful for the people I got to do life with and the experiences I had. I am now just as thankful for the new community that I am a part of at college.
7. Get to know yourself.
It sounds kind of funny, I know. Sure, it is important to know your strengths and weaknesses (especially for job interviews) but there is so much more to you that you might not have put that much thought into. Discover the patterns of how you think, how you interact with people, what excites you and what makes you tick. Understanding these things about yourself can allow you to find the environment that you thrive in and anticipate a setback before it comes.
8. Learn how to take criticism.
I would like to thank my high school art teacher and my current graphic design professors for stressing the importance criticism. After pouring all of my thought, time and energy into a project, I would have to place my work on the chopping block. Having what I created be picked apart by my peers and professors, has taught me how to handle criticism in other parts of my life. We have all experienced this in our school, jobs relationships, etc. It’s important to filter through the criticism and learn from what is constructive and let go of what is not.
9. Call your mother.
One, she will love hearing from you. Two, it is important to seek wisdom from someone who really knows you and who has gone before you.
10. When people show you themselves, believe them.
Speaking of getting advice from your mother, this was something my mom has been telling me for years. It is easy to hold onto what you want a person to be like or to the appealing promises they make to you. In the end, pay attention to what they do, because their actions will speak truth to the type of person they are.
11. Start every day with a cup of coffee and end every day with a cup of tea.
No explanation necessary.
12. Get to know someone before you decide you don't like them.
Confession time. I met this girl in high school and for some crazy reason I did not like her at first. Little did I know that she would end up being one of my best friends throughout all four years. (Don't worry, she knows and it's something we laugh about now.) Moral of the story: give it time. You can't like everybody, but don't sell someone short from one bad experience.
13. Develop organizational systems for yourself.
Life if full of things that need to be organized. Your room, schedule, computer files, etc. You can throw everything into a drawer and call it a day (been there, done that) but the mess will probably reappear not too many days later. The times when I have been the most organized were when I spent a lot of time planning systems of how, when, and where things should go and get done. Once you have established a system, it becomes a lot easier to stick to it. Even if your room or schedule starts to clutter up again having an established organizational system will make it easier to get back on track.
14. When you get in a bad mood you don't have to stay in it.
Sometimes it only takes one little thing to set me off for the rest of the day. I accept the idea that because I had a bad morning, I might as well be in a bad mood the rest of the day. We have more control over our demeanor than we give ourselves credit for. Instead of sulking in self-pity both you and the people around you will benefit from renewing your mind and moving past the negative attitude.
15. There is such power in prayer.
I have seen God heal and provide for me and my family in miraculous ways. Every answered prayer is a testimony of God's faithfulness for me to be reminded of. On a different level I have also seen how prayer can change my heart. When I am honest about my circumstances in prayer, I no longer feel like I have to carry the burden alone. I can have faith knowing that God will use even the bad circumstances in ways that I would never think of.
16. Don’t ignore your health.
Whether it is exercising, clean eating, getting enough sleep or drinking enough water, set practical goals for yourself. Your body will thank you later.
17. Find the friends that stick with you when life gets hard.
Its nice to have friends to do fun things with but that is only part of the job description of a true friend. Some of the hardest seasons I have gone through would have been impossible without the support of my friends. I was often worried about becoming a burden and had to be reminded that best friends want to be there for you when you need them the most.
18. It is, in fact, possible to resist the temptation to buy everything when shopping at Target.
Hard to believe I know. I had to develop a rule for myself when it came to Target's clothing section. Unless I am there to buy something specific, If I feel the magnetic force pulling me towards the clothes (which let's be honest, is just about every time,) I am only allowed to look at the clearance. If I find something in the clearance section that I really like, it has to be under $10 for me to try it on. If I try it on and really like it then I'll get it. This method has saved me many dollars and added some great inexpensive items to my wardrobe.
19. Be grounded in your values and what you believe.
I did not realize how easy it could be to question what I believe until others were questioning it. If you don't know why your values and beliefs are what they are, then how could anyone else. Once you determined the what and why, do not be afraid to stand by what is important to you.
20. Take the time to reflect on what you are learning.
I can barely remember what I ate for breakfast this morning let alone what was going on in my life five years ago. There are so many lessons to learn, but it is too easy to let them slip away. I have discovered the value of taking the time to write and reflect on what I have been learning in my life. The lessons I have been learning for the first 20 years of my life will only be useful if I can recall them when they are needed.
