Ah, servers.
Sometimes we love our job and sometimes we hate it. Sometimes there are great days and sometimes serving is the devil in disguise.
Here's a list of ways to determine if being a server has taken over your life.
1. Your nightmares consist of not being able to get to your table fast enough, waiting on 4 20-tops and running late for your shift.
Server dreams are the absolute worst, am I right?
2. You have this new sense on how to, well, sense people.
I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve been able to predict if a new server will make it or not. Or, even better, I can sense how well my tables going to tip. Don’t believe me? Just watch!
3. Bumping into someone or touching someone’s boob by accident is a normal occurrence.
Is there really any need to say sorry anymore? It happens at least 5 times a shift.
4. You’ve never drank so much alcohol in your life.
A drink after work is a must.
5. You lay in bed after work and the only thing you can think of is how rude table 50 was to you.
Was it necessary for him to freak out like that? No!
6. You now hate teenagers more than you ever have in your life.
Yeah, we know you don’t tip.
7. You used to love kids, and now you’re second guessing ever having them.
Those little things run around like barbarians and leave more food on the floor than in their stomachs.
8. When people complain all you can do is laugh.
I’ve heard it all, trust me.
9. Your camera roll consists of picture of the schedule or peoples phone numbers.
10. Germophobe no more.
I hate germs, but when it comes to cleaning tables the idea of germs just leave my mind.
11. You ache in places you didn’t know you could.
How, at such a young age, can my feet, legs, knees, back, neck and head all ache at the same time?
12. All your stories start with, “You will not believe what happened at work yesterday!”
It’s true, you know it is.
13. When you’re in public you are terrified your regular crazy lady may be watching you.
Regulars are great, but not when they stalk your life.
14. Sleep? What’s sleep?
Say goodbye to any good sleeping habit! When you’re a server it doesn’t matter if you’re not off til 12 AM. You’re still expected to be at work bright and early the next morning.
15. You can never make plans because you just never know when you’ll be off work.
The struggle to keep a social life is real.
16. Going out after work is impossible because, “I work a double tomorrow, sorry.”
It’s your life story.
17. You learn to trust no one.
You just never know.
18. Half your paycheck goes to new pens, your 5th nametag, and new work shirts.
They get lost, okay?
19. You've been deprived of 3 meals a day.
Who eats 3 times a day anymore anyway? I'm lucky to get 2 in, esecially on a servers schedule!
20. Your family has stopped inviting you to family dinners or holiday parties because chances are, you're not gonna make it.
Servers love the holidays! (That was sarcastic.)
Even though serving sucks the life out of us sometimes, it does have its perks- we just don’t like to talk about them.
In what ways has waiting on tables taken over your life? I want to know! Be sure to leave comments below.
