You know what they say: Hindsight is 20/20 (no pun intended). We all have things we wish we could go back and tell our younger selves. Turning 20 is a big deal because you're no longer a teen; you're finally officially a young adult, and that can be scary. After doing some reflection on my 20th birthday, I came up with 20 things I've learned that help me get the most out of each day.
1. Take a chance
Try something you've never done once in awhile or something that pushes you out of your comfort zone a little. You never know, you might just fall in love with whatever you're doing and pick up a new hobby!
2. Smile
Seriously. I hate when I smile at someone in passing and they don't smile back. A smile can brighten someone's day, even just for that moment. You never know what act of kindness a smile can inspire.
3. Don’t be hard on yourself
We are our own worst enemies. Remember that while being nice to others is important, being nice to yourself is important, too. So you procrastinated a little too long on that paper, or maybe you cheated on your diet. Relax. It happens to even the best of us.
4.It’s okay not to have everything figured out
Again, seriously. Ask anyone older than you; they've had much more time to figure things out, and chances are, they still haven't gotten things figured out. You're 20 years old, for goodness' sake--take a deep breath and come to terms with the fact that some things you just have to play by ear.
5. Indulge
Eat that piece of cake. Spend your entire paycheck on clothes and concerts. Drink a little too much one night. This is the only time you are your sole responsibility; enjoy it.
6. Never pass up an opportunity
If someone offers you an opportunity and it will cost you nothing but time, take it. You never know where that opportunity could lead you, be it to a lifelong friend, a beneficial connection, or just something you find you enjoy doing.
7. Be a little selfish
You have no responsibilities right now aside from school. Do what you want (within reason). Apply for summer positions in cities you've never been to. Take a trip. Hell, lock yourself in your room and binge-watch several seasons of your favorite show on Netflix, if it floats your boat.
8. Take time for yourself
Everyone needs time to recharge, especially when college students are as busy as we tend to be. Remember that you don't have to go out every Friday night or commit yourself to every single event for your organization; make time to do yoga or listen to music. Give yourself a chance to breathe and focus on your mental well-being.
9. Be single for a while
This was something that for me personally was eye-opening. It's not for everyone and that's absolutely okay; but for me, taking the time to be single for a while gave me the opportunity to become comfortable in myself, and to really think about what I want out of my next relationship. Because I'm comfortable being on my own, I can choose--happily--not to be with someone because I know what I want and I'm not so scared of being alone that I am willing to sacrifice that. Plus, I've gotten to enjoy myself more without having to worry about someone else's happiness.
10. Find what you love
Find something you really love to do and invest in it. Whether it's something you can do for a career or something you do in your free time, everyone needs an outlet for any stress or energy, and a hobby is great for that.
11. Learn to budget
I'll be the first to admit it: I'm awful with money. And I mean bad. Learning to budget now while you're young and have fewer responsibilities will create a helpful habit that will only make your life easier in the future. Come on, how could you not?
12. Listen to your parents
It only took me 20 years to figure this one out. Believe it or not, they know what they're talking about. (Crazy, right?)
13. Get organized
You don't have to have everything figured out, but at least try to have your shit together. You can make being a hot mess work in college, but in the real world, being organized will be a huge advantage for you as you become successful in your career and in your life. Again, start this habit now because it can only help you in the long run.
14. Make a motivational playlist
...For everything. Girls' Nights Out? Playlist. Formal events? Playlist. A summer mix of all your favorites for that bonfire or nighttime drive? Playlist. Give them fun names like "Nasty Women Mixtape 2017 *insert emoji here*" because as if the bomb playlist wasn't enough, a cute name just adds to it.
15. Don’t try to please everyone
You can't.
Let me say that one more time for the people in the back:
YOU. CAN'T. It's impossible. Life will be so much easier when you realize that and stop doing things because you want to please everyone.
16. Make connections/network
I can't stress this enough: You never know who you're gonna meet where. Don't be afraid to network and make connections with people who inspire you; chances are, they remember when they were our age and just starting out, and they'll be flattered to hear from you. Either way, if you reach out asking for advice, the worst they can do is not answer. In the grand scheme of things, is that really that bad?
17. One solid friend wins vs. a squad of people who won’t be there
It will always be better to have one or two friends you know you can rely on than it is to have a million friends who aren't there when it comes down to it. That's all I can say.
18. Make time to reflect
Make time to sit down with yourself and figure out what you want from your life, be it a relationship, a career, or just a goal you have. Determine where you are in achieving that goal, what you need to do to get there, and how you want to do that.
Or, just reflect on life. Take a minute to think about the good things, no matter how big or small they may be. Appreciate everything, because it's easy to let yourself be sucked into the bad if you don't.
19. Be honest with yourself
No one likes to admit their flaws or weaknesses, but how can you get better if you don't know where you need to improve? Saying "Wow, that was such a stupid thing to do," gives you the chance to recognize that it was a mistake and figure out how to keep it from happening again. (but remember, don't beat yourself up.)
20. Live your best life
At 20 years old, we're still young. We have our whole lives ahead of us and for now, we have a lot of time and very little responsibility in comparison to the next few years. Obviously, don't put yourself in danger, but do what you want. Find things that make you happy. Indulge once in awhile. Live your best life.