I'd like to thank all of the ignorant morons (both men and women) who have inspired me to write this article. You know who you are!

Hope this isn't "too gay" for anyone. Enjoy!

1. "That's hot."

Thanks, I guess?

2. "Makes sense, you kind of dress like a lesbian."

How does someone "dress like a lesbian?"

Did my "I Love Girls" tattoo on my forehead gives it away?

3. "Want to have a threesome with me and my girlfriend?"

No thanks, I'm good.

4. "You just haven't met the right guy yet."

Yep, definitely not that.

5. "How do you have sex?"

How do you have sex?

Google it.

6. "You're gay? But you're so pretty!"

So, gay people are ugly and straight people are pretty?

Seriously, have you seen Ruby Rose?

7. "When did you decide to become a lesbian?"

I did not "decide" on anything. I just am. Also, I did not "become" a lesbian, I always was.

8. "You're so lucky you don't have to deal with guys. I wish I was a lesbian!"

^^LOL at the people who actually believe people this.

9. "Are you going to have children?"

Are you?

10. "I've always wanted to be friends with a lesbian!"

I guess you can add me to your bucket list then?

Want to go sky-diving, too? You could kill two birds with one stone on your bucket list!

11. "Have you ever had sex with a guy?"

Have you?

How is this any of your business?

12. "You won't be gay when I'm done with you."

I'm pretty positive that I will be.

PLEASE spare me.

12a. "I'll f*** you 'til you're straight."

Please don't.

Back away, straight boy, back away...

13. "Are you sure that you're gay?"

Yes. I am sure.

13a. "You're young, this is just a phase."

14. "You're gay? I have always wanted to experiment with girls..."

I mean, I'm down, but I'm not your science fair experiment.

15. "As a Catholic, aren't you worried about being gay?"

The Bible is also against wearing mixed fabrics, tattoos, and eating shellfish. As a gay person with tattoos, an owner of poly-cotton blend clothes, and a lover of shrimp, if I'm going to hell, I'm practically sprinting there.

16. "I don't judge anyone based on their sexual preference."

Glad that you don't judge people. Heads up, it's not a preference.

17. "So are you going to be the girl or the guy?"

Neither. We're both girls.

Google the definition of lesbian if you are confused.

18. "How does scissoring work?

19. "You must be a feminist."

Lesbians are necessarily feminists, and feminists aren't necessarily lesbians.

I am a feminist because I believe in the equality of the sexes, not because I am gay. Sexual orientation has nothing to do with being a decent human being.

20. "Couldn't you just date a guy if you wanted to?"

Been there, done that. No, thank you.

To my fellow gay gals: F*** the haters, embrace youself, and let your pride flag fly!