Some people would think of a 20 year old as still being a child. There's no doubt that everyone continues to grow, learn, and evolve every single day... no matter how old they are. However, I believe that the first portion of your life is when you learn the most significant lessons and develop the framework of the values that you will continue to uphold throughout the rest of your life.
1. Life isn't always fair
I learned this at a very young age. Most of the time, bad things happen to good people and good things happen to bad people.
2. Everything happens for a reason
Going off of the first lesson, it may not always seem like it in the moment, but I strongly believe that something good comes from everything; whether it be a new outlook on life or a lesson learned for the future. Change in general always brings about new experiences and emotions.
3. It's more than okay to be selfish sometimes
The word "selfish" often comes with a negative connotation. However, all it really means is that you're putting yourself first. It's best to think of others and take their feelings into account the majority of the time, but it's also healthy to make sure that you're fulfilling your own needs and wants as well.
4. Eye contact is crucial
I was always taught growing up that you should always hold good eye contact when talking to others because it shows that you're truly interested in what they have to say. It wasn't until this past semester when one of my teachers called me out in the middle of class asking if I had something to say because I was the only one that was looking at her during her presentation. When I told her I didn't have anything to say, she responded with, "oh, I just thought you did because you made eye contact with me."
5. Sometimes it's alright to spend $5 on a coffee
The terms "broke" and "college student" go together like peanut butter and jelly. Even if you can't afford to buy yourself something over the top, a fancy cup of joe can often be the perfect pick-me-up or reward.
6. A smile can go a long ways
I really hope I don't need to explain this, but there's no harm in smiling at strangers.
7. You will most likely dislike at least one thing about everyone you meet
This may seem incredibly pessimistic, but it's crucial to know. Whenever I meet someone new and begin to form a relationship with them, I start to realize things that I never knew before. Whether it be a small pet peeve or a massive difference in values, understanding that you won't ever meet someone who you find absolutely flawless is essential.
8. Icing and frosting are not the same thing
My beloved Nanny (grandmother) taught me this. She owned the most amazing bakery on the planet. She instilled in me the difference between her homemade buttercream icing and the processed "frosting" that comes in a can.
9. Admit to your mistakes when you've made them
Recognizes when you've made a mistake is important, but it's even more important to admit to someone when you've wronged them. Nobody is perfect, so it's not a sign of weakness to confess that you're human.
10. Everyone wants what they can't have
From the moment my hair started growing, I desperately wanted shiny straight hair instead of the frizzy ringlets I was cursed with. No matter what you have, you're almost always going to find something that you'd want more. You're not alone in this. Everyone is that way.
11. Thank your parents
Despite everything they've done for me financially, my parents have taught me more than I could've ever asked for from them.
12. You don't necessarily need to have a "hobby"
People always ask me, "So what do you like to do in your free time?" I always freeze because I never know what to say. As I try more and more things throughout my life I'm sure that I'll find something that I enjoy, but right now there's nothing that I would consider to be a hobby of mine.
13. Friends can be your soulmates
I learned this from the television show, "Sex and the City." Everyone puts so much emphasis on finding a romantic life partner who they're destined to be with. I've found that some of the friendships that I've made over the years have bettered me in ways I never thought possible.
14. Explore your city
Some of the most insane adventures that I've been on have been nights when my friends and I have nothing to do so we just decide to go walk around downtown or try some hole-in-the-wall restaurant. Sometimes we have an amazing time and others we don't, but we always end up with the best stories.
15. Retail therapy is a real thing
Don't get me wrong, it's never healthy to ignore a problem and let it develop into an even bigger issue. However, taking a break and diverting your attention to something that excites you, like buying a new pair of shoes, helps you to breathe and reevaluate.
16. You don't need to have a million friends
When I got to college I was convinced that I'd find it hard to manage my time because of all of the people that I'd meet and friendships that would come of them. However, I realized that while it's always good to be nice and reach out to new people, there's nothing wrong with nurturing the friendships that you already have the most and spending the majority of your time with the ones that you already know you have fun with.
17. Spending an entire day in your pajamas, watching movies and eating popcorn is perfectly fine
My pajama collection is honestly outrageous. I own about five pairs of footie pajamas, seven nightgowns, and an innumerable amount of pajama shirts and pants. That being said, there's nothing I love more than cozying up in bed and streaming one of my favorite movies or TV shows off of Netflix. This doesn't make me lazy, I just enjoy my peaceful alone time.
18. Don't let people take advantage of you
I'm the type of person that cannot hold a grudge at all and that instantly accepts someone’s apology. This can be both a good and a bad thing. The negative to this is that once someone knows that they can get away with something, they'll do it again. Stand strong against others and show them how you want to be treated.
19. You can never overuse "I love you"
Never be afraid to tell someone how you feel, or even just to remind them if they already know.
20. Happiness is a feeling, not a destination
I'll admit that I'm still trying to work on this. It's so easy to think to yourself, "I'll be happy once I do this or get that," but that's not realistic. There have been so many times when I've told myself that I'll be happy once something happens, and once that finally happens I don't feel any different. That's why it's important to learn to live in the moment and appreciate where you are.
