Twenty. Home to the age where all those blog posts about "Life in your 20's" are finally considered acceptable to be reading, where you're basically considered an "adult" who will be making major life decisions, and it is home to "the best times of your life." That sure is a lot of pressure for one part of our life, but as I enter this new decade I am sure grateful I have learned some pretty hard lessons in my first 19 years.
1. They weren't lying when they said, "You'll be able to count the amount of true friends you can call, at any time of day for any reason, on one hand."
I was first told this in sixth grade by my school principal. I laughed afterwards thinking he must be crazy and a terrible friend for that to be true. I made it my mission that day that this line would never apply to me. I guess you can say I failed. But that's okay. The true friends I can count on one hand are worth more than my two hands together.
2. Life is already hard. There is no need to make it harder.
My best friend taught me this one recently, and there sure is a lot of truth to this statement. Life brings us many bumps and bruises, and it is OK to ask for help. Stop making your life harder than it needs to be.
3. Keep jumping oceans for the people you love, even if they're only jumping puddles for you.
Trust me on this one -- you'll regret it if you were once a ocean jumper and are suddenly a puddle jumper.
4. Failure can teach you more than any success ever can if you let it.
I'd by lying if I said failures and rejections don't hurt. But looking back now, some of those failures and rejections shaped me into a better person than any of my successes have. From not being selected into an organization I really hoped to be a part of, to not having the opportunity to lead a club I was truly passionate for, I have learned to value leadership and service without a title and how to look at the bigger picture of life.
5. There is a fine line between confidence and cockiness.
Know it, but don't cross it.
6. There is nothing wrong with being confident.
Believe in yourself, believe in your capabilities and believe you were made for greatness. There is no better way to go into a test, challenge or difficult life moment than with some inner self-confidence.
7. Life chats, heart-to-hearts, soul spilling -- or whatever you call it -- is one of life's greatest blessings.
There is no better way to truly get to know someone than by sharing the questions that haunt us, the future that scares us, or the past that made us. Value these moments and value the words being shared. You can't plan these moments, but you sure can be present when they occur.
8. Prepare all you want, but there will always be somebody better than you.
Accept it. Learn from them. Don't be jealous. Even on those moments where you feel like you are on top of the world or at the bottom of the barrel.
9. Focus more time on your strengths, not your weaknesses.
Because spending more time on math as a communications major just doesn't make sense.
10. You don't have to have your life completely pulled together and tied up with a big, pretty bow.
It is completely unrealistic to think that anyone's life is that perfect, so don't fret when you think your life is a complete mess.
11. You also don't have to know exactly where you're going.
And even when you think you do, life is probably going to throw you a big curveball and you'll have to reconsider. Back to life lesson 10, it is.
12. It is always the right time for waffles.
In the words of Leslie Knope, "We have to remember what's important in life: friends, waffles, and work. Or waffles, friends, and work. But work has to come third."
13. Life can and will be unlucky, unfair, and unpleasant sometimes.
There is a reason this is life lesson 13. Fortunately, these times too will pass.
14. Sometimes you absolutely, positively have to say no.
Whether that's to hanging out tomorrow night, or taking on yet another leadership role, nobody knows our self-limits better than ourselves so be sure to say no before the final straw breaks the camels back.
15. Pictures are oh so important.
While I know they say if you are really living in the moment you won't have time or feel the need to take pictures, I completely disagree. Because eight months later when you want to frame that moment or hang it on your wall to remember forever, you can't. So live in the moment, but take a couple pictures too. They might even make a good throwback Thursday in 28 and a half years.
16. It is utterly impossible for every single person you meet to like you and want to be your friend.
Just make sure you like you and you resemble the traits you would want in a friend. The rest will follow.
17. Family will always be family.
So don't be afraid to go far away for college, or to travel the world, because at the end of the day when you call home or at the end of your adventure when you visit home, family will be just like you remembered and just what you needed.
18. We all break, but it all happens for a reason.
Bones break, hearts break, spirits break and Kit-Kats break. Brave through the growing pains, you'll end up stronger for it.
19. When you ask someone how they are doing, actually wait to hear their answer.
This is a big one. All too often we get in the habit of asking, "Hi, how are you?" that we assume the answer will be, "Good, how about yourself?" And then we say, "Good," and keep moving on with our lives. I'm still challenging myself to give better answers and to listen to the answers of others, because at the end of the day we are so much more than the word, "Good."
20. Life cannot and should not be planned or measured by age milestones.
Another big one. It is easy to compare ourselves to the standards that age has created. You were not a bad baby if you didn't get potty trained until a year after all the other babies; you are not a failure if you didn't learn to ride a bike until 12; you are not a slacker if you didn't get your first job until 19; you will not burst into flames if you are not graduated by 22; and you will not die if you are not married by 25 or a CEO by 50. While it can be easy to have the age checklist, and while it can be cliche to say, "age is just a number," it is important to remember aging is certainly not a race.
